Egyptian Slick-haired Gerbils

My sister has two kids around the same age as Colby & Sonya. Friday, Colby stayed with Jacob and Madison came home with Sonya and I. We stopped at the pet store so Sonya could use her own money to buy a gerbil. We've had gerbils before and hamsters and guinea pigs and rabbits - as well as dogs, cats & fish. I think that's it. Anyhow, all of the rodents have met untimely deaths, usually at the paws of the cats!

So we go to the pet store and Sonya picks the gerbil she wants and some food & supplies for it. She paid $2.99 for the gerbil. Halfway home Madison says she really wishes she could have gotten a gerbil. I tell her I would have bought her one if she would have said something and we'll ask her mom & go back & get one tomorrow.

Mom says yes, and reluctantly, dad OKs the new pet, too. So Christmas Eve, I am shopping, not at all near the pet store where we bought Sonya's gerbil, so I go into Petco. I look and look for gerbils but I don't see any. I'm getting a little frantic because I've been putting Madison off since Friday and I promised her I'd have her gerbil when she came down on Christmas day.

Finally, I find a salesperson and ask if there are any gerbils left - she says yes, I have one little black one left - Great! I don't care what it looks like as long as it's a gerbil. I follow her to the rodent area. Sure enough, there's a little black gerbil nestled in the corner of the cage. I quickly look at the price, knowing I'll have to pay more than $2.99, but how much could it be and this is my last stop - the price.....

$13.99 - wtf? ARe you kidding me? I mean I was willing to pay a little more, but over 4 times as much? I don't think so! So I said - Is this price correct? She said yes as she was scooping the little guy out and I said well, never mind. I just bought one in Bonne Terre for $2.99 and she said - get this...

Oh, well this one is an Egyptian Slick-haired gerbil and it's special. Huh? What can it do - flips? Will it jump out of the cage and hit the snooze button for me or at least get up and make the coffee? I say none of this to the clerk, though I'm sure she read my mind and then I said 'No, thanks! I don't need a special gerbil - besides the cat will probably get it before too long anyway!' The look on her face was priceless - but not worth $13.99.

I called and begged my brother-in-law to run to Bonne Terre and get me a gerbil for which I would gladly pay him $2.99 plus gas money! He agreed and saved Christmas for me - and he didn't even charge me. I guess it was paybacks for us hauling his new 56" flatscreen TV home for him. It sure pays to do for others:)

Sonya is happy, Madison is happy, my brother-in-law, Robert is happy - and I'm sure the Egyptian Slick-haired gerbil is happy to be safe in it's cage at Petco and not in a cage with a flimsy lid that cats can get in to very easily. Everyone wins!

I have my two youngest kids at work with me today. Colby had to go get some labs done - an ultrasound (he may have another hernia -would be his third) so I brought them both with me. They have been pretty good - but they get loud sometimes, just like they're at home. It's been pretty quiet today - not many people at the university once the students have been dismissed for the semester so it hasn't been a big deal. Except, Colby begs and begs to come to work with me and when he gets here - he is watching the clock all day for the time to come when we can go home! I don't know what is up with that kid.

We went to DJs basketball game last night. It was the first time he got to play. He was in for the last 1:07 minutes. I was a little disappointed that he only got to play for that amount of time, but he was happy so I am happy!

Things with hubby are a little better. He's still getting really crabby, but I'm trying to remind him gently to check his attitude at the door and I think he is working on it. He's been letting Heather have a little more freedom. He lets her know he did her a favor when she gets home - but at least she gets to go. It still really makes me mad how he treats all of our kids, Heather and DJ especially, but I'm trying to make this work a little at a time.

I'm not quite finished with Christmas shopping yet, but we will hopefully finish up tomorrow. Just Darrell and I will start early tomorrow and probably end late, but hopefully we'll get everything done and still have a couple of days off of work to wrap things and enjoy the time off.

Well, everyone - I don't usually post when I'm not at work - but I may so in case I don't, I hope all of my blog friends have a happy holiday and here are my best wishes for a happy new year!

Jim Edmonds is leaving the St. Louis Cardinals:((

My boys are devastated! Jim Edmonds has been a golden glove centerfielder for the Cardinals for 7 years and he was DJs all-time favorite player. My boys follow baseball religiously and they're both so upset! It kinda reminded me of how boys used to feel about baseball players back in the day - they're so sad that we're losing him that they want to kill the coach, Tony LaRusa. I'm sad to see him go because he is damned cute, has a gorgeous smile and looks great in his uniform! Last night Colby asked me if I would dump Dad for Jim Edmonds and I said 'in a heartbeat' - He just laughed!

We had our annual staff Christmas lunch today. I was hoping to be told we'd get a bonus, but no chance! Bad part is I used to work in a different department for the same place and there we got $500! I wasn't really counting on it, but it sure would have been nice:)

Just talked to hubby on the phone and he sure seems like he's in a bad mood! I feel a sinus infection coming on and was hoping to go straight home and get some rest - I hope he gets over his crankiness before I get there.

Sonya (my 8 year old) decided a couple of weeks ago she was going to become a vegetarian. She made signs and picketed our home to "Save the Animals" - she never wanted to eat another animal as long as she lived. She did really well with it eating fruits, vegetables - lots of peanut butter and Ramen noodles until we went to McDonald's - she ordered Chicken McNuggets and said she'd be a vegetarian another time, maybe in the summertime when it's easier - go figure!

Ready for Christmas...

It's been awhile since I posted, so I thought I'd update you all. Things are going pretty well in our house this week. My husband and I spent some time out with friends this weekend and it seemed to bring us a little closer. Maybe that's what we need and I told him so. We used to spend time alone every weekend and we haven't done that since I don't know when. When we did this weekend, it was enjoyable and I remembered some things I love about him, so we'll try to continue to spend couple time as much as possible.

I've just about got my kid's Christmas presents bought - but found today that Heather is way overboard - I usually try to keep them all the same - but I'm so excited about two of her gifts, I just cannot take anything back - and no one will really know but me because most of her stuff is clothes. She asked for this perfume - Princess by Vera Wang - Heather is a self-proclaimed princess and I got it - she's gonna be so excited - it will be a total surprise unlike most of her presents of clothing. Also, I ordered her this really expensive flat iron for her hair. It's supposed to be what all the models use and she straightens her hair everyday - I cannot wait for her to open these two gifts - and no one will know how expensive they were. I mean - who would think someone would be dumb enough to pay $100 for a flat iron:) It has been so difficult the last few years getting her things that she doesn't know about because I can't buy her clothes without her being with me and last year I did the gift card thing - but it was kind of a let down on Christmas morning - but probably only for me - not her. Anyway - I'm excited about Christmas.

I think all my kids will be extremely happy - I may have a little more to do for Sonya - when I counted everything up - she was a little short - I try to keep things kind of equal and she did get some clothes - so I want to make sure Colby doesn't have the most (everyone thinks he's my favorite - but as all of you know - there's no such thing in a mother's heart).

Thursday Blahs

Don't really have much to say today - I'm trying hard to be in the holiday spirit, I have a big portion of my presents bought and plan to put the tree up this weekend. It's supposed to be cold, rainy & icy here this weekend, so maybe we'll bake some cookies or something. Also, our annual town Christmas Parade is Saturday and my daughter wants me to drive our truck with it full of cheerleaders during the parade. I hope the bad weather holds out for the parade to pass through.

Thanksgiving Wishes

Just wanted to wish everyone a happy & safe Thanksgiving. I will be picking up my sister and niece & nephew after work today. They will spend all night tonight & her hubby will follow tomorrow morn. She lives about 1 1/2 hours from me & wants to be there to help prepare - I'm looking so forward to it - hopefully, we'll have a couple of drinks, relax, talk & laugh & laugh - I'm sure we'll do some preparations for Thursday, too.

Her son, Jacob is 12, right between my two sons so they all get along very well, they'll probably play video games all night and her daughter, Madison is the very same age as my Sonya (they're only 4 weeks apart). Madison has rented Annie and wants me to print the words out so the two of them can put on a show for us. That should be hilarious.

She'll spend the night Thursday too and we'll get up at the crack of dawn for some shopping - I know it's crazy but the two of us had so much fun last year running around and getting the bargains - we're both really looking forward to it.

I'm so very grateful for my little sister - we are so close, I don't know what I would do without her. Sometimes, she is my rock and sometimes I am hers - we're there for each other without any of the bs some families face. We lost our mom when we were only 17 and 22 - and it's been a rough road these past 15 years, but we've gotten each other through it and we're alot closer from the experience.

I'm also so very thankful for my children and also for my husband though we aren't always on the same page. I'm glad we are all healthy and have plenty to eat and a roof above us. Thank you God for the blessings you have given me.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

oooh - I'm so mad!

DJ is a Freshman. This has been his best year since the 5th grade when he was diagnosed with OCD. He has kept his grades decent - no D's for F's and hasn't called me wanting to come home 3-4 days a week for the first time in 4 years. He recently made the basketball team and I consider this year a real positive for him.

In comes his 2nd hour teacher - Mrs. T. She sucks eggs! Her policy is that you are late for class unless you are sitting in your seat when the bell rings. Yes he knows this, he was tardy for the 5th time since August 16th on Friday and he received 3 days of In-School Suspension for this infraction. He was in the class - but hadn't made it to his seat yet - he missed it by mere seconds. The 3rd time he was late was the last week in September when he was standing at his desk organizing his papers in his folder (very difficult for someone with OCD) and his 4th tardy came when he was sitting at his desk finishing a Carmello bar and had a wrapper with caramel all over it that he didn't want to get on his hands (also difficult for someone with OCD). He got out of his seat to throw the wrapper away & didn't make it back to his seat in time before the bell rang - again he missed it by seconds.

While I understand he should be old enough to understand and follow the rules of the class - I feel this teacher is being a complete witch - if she only knew what we had gone through with him in the last 4 years. Oh, I could just plow her!!!!!

Anyway, this will mean that he will be forced to miss his first basketball game tomorrow night, will miss one practice which will put him in jeopardy of missing more games and the coach told him "you better be prepared to run - that's what happens to students that don't follow the rules - they run the entire practice". I called the principal and while he was sympathetic, he didn't agree to make any changes. My husband is on his way in there now to discuss it. We may have to get an IEP allowing him time between classes to wash his hands, get organized or whatever - something I didn't want to have to do in high school and neither did he.

I get it, really I do, but in this kid's case, I feel like so many things have been stacked against him and he's finally digging out and he's being stuffed back in by this teacher - who by the way told him in October that she didn't appreciate him coming to his parents and complaining about her (we called after his 4th tardy)- she requested that he write an apology to her and she also said she didn't appreciate having to take time away from her family to speak with the principal or with his parents because he couldn't follow the rules - excuse me, I thought that was her job and I've taught my son to come to me with problems he's having so I can help him get through them. I forwarded the principal the email he sent her so we'll see if anything happens. Thanks for listening to me vent.

Stay - by Sugarland

I absolutely love this song. Luckily, I don't think I've ever been in this situation but she sings it with so much heart and emotion - I can feel what she's going through - just by listening to this song. I love it. Enjoy!

Deer Season in Missouri - Yay!

Husband is gone this morning and son will be leaving tonight - yay! I love chilly weekends when the boys are gone. My youngest son will be home, but he's a sweetheart and won't bug me too much.

Gonna try to get a little more housework done to continue on my spree from last weekend and try to get some stuff in order for Turkey Day! But mostly, I'm looking forward to just vegging out in front of the TV, reading & eating, eating, eating:)

On another note, I just want to say that I am so thankful to God that I have been blessed so much by Him. I have 4 wonderfully, healthy children - my health and that of my husband is good and we don't have alot of money, etc. worries like some do. - We're not rich, by far, but we can usually pay our electric bill when it comes - though sometimes, we do have to do it in two payments:) Anyway - Heather, 17 has a friend with cystic fibrosis and she is in the hospital with it now. Heather visited her yesterday and had many stories last night of the hard life this girl has had for the last 17 years - her life expectancy is only 25-30. Very, very sad - but the girl just wants to be treated the same as everyone.

Also, this morning I was listening to a fund raiser on the radio for St. Louis Children's Hospital and lots of patients & their parents told stories of their illnesses and how difficult it had been on their entire families. Makes me so glad to be so blessed and my heart truly hurts for these children and their families.

Thank you God for the blessings you have bestowed upon me.

Bad, Bad Blogger

I've been a bad blogger. I love to talk (write) and tell people about things that go on in my life, but for some reason lately, I just haven't felt like I have anything to say here. I open it up first thing every morning and read everyone else's blog, but I haven't commented or blogged myself.

Last week a very dear friend of mine lost her mother. This woman was very special to me when I was a teenager - she was a really good soul and she will be missed by her children tremendously. She had 3 grown children and 5 grandchildren. These next few weeks or months even will be really hard for my friend and I hope I can find the strenth to be there for her. The funeral was tough for me because I lost my own mother in November 15 years ago and I still miss her every day.

I went back to church on Sunday - my children have been going on Wednesday nights and the pastor asked when their parents would return - they had been missing us for the last several months. So, I decided I would put the pain of my mom and the confusion about my life in God's hands. I was really excited to go and was really looking forward to "feeling something", but I really didn't. The message was about living good in a bad world and I just didn't get that into it. Sometimes, I'll go and they'll either sing a song my mom used to like or the message will be something I remember her talking about and I'll feel like she's there with me and she's looking down with gladness that her daughter and family are in church, but I just didn't get that this Sunday. I'm planning to return this week and I've been praying more often than usual (though this could certainly increase and it wouldn't hurt me one darn bit) - I'm hoping that God will guide me to do what he has in store for me - but, how will I know when He's telling me something? How do you know if it is God directing you or your own thoughts driving you to do what your self-conscience wants to do?

Anyway better go for now. Thanks for listening.

Tagged-Not so much by Kathi

I got this idea from Kathi's blog. I know I'm getting a little old for Nick Lachey, but I just can't help it. He's soooo hot!

I was sick all weekend (and it was a weekend that I only had my youngest two children at home with me) I would have liked to do something special with them and the weather was gorgeous - so it would have been great to go hiking in the park or something like that - but I felt like crap! I'm a little better today, but still not 100% and I have class tonight so it's gonna be a long day. Better get back to work.

Adjustment Disorder

This is what the doctor called what I've been experiencing lately. Well, he said that's what he was putting on the paperwork (apparently, if you have a mental illness, it can follow you for a long time and you could end up paying higher premiums for some insurance, etc) so that's what he put. Really, he said I have a lot of stress, some anxiety and a life that is too full right now, but that probably won't change much anytime soon. Yep, you got it dude! But I coulda told you that.

No, really, he was very nice and easy to talk to. He didn't make me feel uncomfortable at all. I spoke to him about my husband and he said to just keep "gently" encouraging him to seek someone to talk to, even if it's not to get medicine. He said around his age (39) some men start having hormonal fluctuations (didn't even think about guys having hormones) that could be the reason for the depression. He gave me some good ideas about how to talk to him about it.

I went to Florida this past weekend and we really had a good time there together. We were stress and kid-free and I'm really glad I went. Some friends of ours are getting divorced and we talked alot about them and their kids and how we don't want to end up like them or put our kids through dealing with a divorce. Since we got home, we've both been trying really hard to be more attentive and also to back each other up with the kids. At least I feel better for now. We'll see in a week or two.

He actually came by my work today (he's only done that one other time in 6 years) after his doctor's appt. He found out he has to have surgery for a herniated disc in a few weeks. Maybe if he stops living in so much pain, he'll be a little happier. I talked to him about what the doctor told me - that maybe he should consider going just to talk some things out - and he just looked at me like I was crazy - so I will continue to gently encourage and we'll see how it goes.

I'm so freaking hungry!!!!!

I started "dieting" Monday, trying to use the weight watchers plan w/o the meetings and the cost. My friend and I are weighing in in front of each other every week - to keep us honest and I'm starving! I used a big chunk of my points when I went to lunch with my husband before dropping him off at the airport and I'm trying to wait until I leave work to start munching on my celery & carrots! Maybe I'll chew a piece of gum & it'll hold me over.

BTW, Darrell will be gone for 6 days. It really takes a load off for them to leave for awhile every now and then - though I'm sure I'll be ready for him to take over when he gets back. Although, part of me will miss him and I almost decided to buy a pricey ticket and join him this weekend - but, I think I'll use this time to let my heart grow a little fonder.

Weekend Running Around

Had a pretty busy weekend. Went out with some friends on Friday night and had an absolute blast. We had margueritas first, then on to a sports bar where we shot pool & danced some. We laughed our butts off - well me literally - I was doing some smooth dance moves & split the butt right out of my pants - hahahahah! I had to leave directly after that, but we had such a good time. Too bad my husband was a jackass about it - but oh well, that's a story for another day. It was fun and I can't wait until we get together again. We're going to try to plan something spooky for October - maybe go to a haunted house or something - we'll see.

Heather had to take her ACT at 8 on Sat morning, so I was up & at em early. Colby had a football game at 11 & then we went for pizza for one of his friend's birthdays. He had two friends spend the night & I just went in my room & watched movies & ate, & ate & ate! I watched Tyler Perry's Daddy's Girls - it was really sweet - I can't watch those sappy movies when Darrell's home so I took advantage of his hunting trip & watched silly stuff all night.

Colby had a b-day party on Sunday for a GIRL! When I picked him up, he said he was going out with a 6th grader named Colbi - weird, huh? He's so goofy. They "go out" usually for about a week & then "go out" with someone else. He had baseball practice on Sunday evening - so I did homework for this God forsaken Economics class I have to take this semester - it's gonna be the ruin of me.

So, the whole weekend, I pretty much ran Colby around to all of his activities. Sonya woke up Saturday morning deciding that she wanted to learn to crochete (my sis-in-law told her she'd teach her) so it was off to Walmart for yarn & a needle. Beth showed me how to do it (I remembered a little from when I was young) and I taught Sonya - but she got impatient very easily & I ended up doing most of her scarf she was making for her rabbit. I guess she's finished with that idea.

DJ was with his dad all weekend and Heather was enjoying that time that Darrell was away from the house - she actually got to have a life. He is getting ready to leave for Florida tomorrow for softball and won't return until Monday.

I made a video

It's my first one ever. It's kind of dorky, just all of my kids and their friends. I hope if you watch it you don't get too bored, but I really love this song.

Here we go again

My 14 y/o son DJ was diagnosed in the 5th grade with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). His main fear is germs. He takes medication now that seems to keep it at bay, but there are still parts of his personality that I know are controlled by this terrible sickness.

Anywhoo, we are managing that (or so we think). Monday, a boy in Colby's (10 y/o, 5th grader) class had a 4-wheeler accident and was hurt pretty badly. It was iffy whether or not he would make it for awhile. Darrell & Colby heard about it at football practice on Monday and told the rest of the kids about it when they got home. Everyone was pretty upset, but Colby seemed like it didn't really phase him too much. This is not one of his close friends, though they did play basketball together last year.

This morning when I woke Colby up to eat breakfast (he's had waffles for breakfast every day for at least 3 years, if not longer) here's what he told me.

Colby: I don't want waffles.

Me: Too bad, I already fixed them. Why wouldn't you want waffles?

Colby: Mrs. Y (the school counselor) told me to try something different for breakfast because my stomach's been hurting in the morning.

Me: When did you talk to Mrs. Y about your stomach ache, wasn't the nurse there?

Colby: When I went to see her about J (the hurt boy)

Me: Oh, did they talk to all of you about J & the dangers of not wearing a helmet while on the 4-wheeler?

Colby: Yes.

Heather then came in and said: Oh yeah, mom. Colby said he had to go see Mrs. Y yesterday because he was crying about J.

Me: What? How come? They said he's going to be alright.

Colby: I know, I just couldn't stop crying.

Me: Oh. Do you want me to fix you something else for breakfast?

Colby: No, I'll eat the waffles.

Right before the bus came, Colby started saying his stomach hurt again. I told him to go to school and if it didn't stop bothering him to call home & Dad would pick him up. After the bus drove off, I got to feeling guilty about making him go to school (He is not a morning person and I just thought he'd be OK once he got going). So I called the school counselor.

Mrs. Y: I'm glad you called. I was going to call you.

Me: I'm just a little worried about Colby and he had a stomach ache this morning & said he talked to you. I wanted to make sure you guys knew that Darrell works from home and that if Colby is sick you can call him & he'll come to get him.

Mrs. Y: Sure, but I wanted to let you know that I got a red flag yesterday when I talked to him about J. He seemed excessively worried (OH NO! WHAT! THOSE ARE THE SAME WORDS USED TO DESCRIBE DJ IN THE 5TH GRADE WHEN HE STARTED GETTING STOMACH ACHES AT SCHOOL). He's worried about you driving back and forth to work and getting in an accident. He's worried about his dad's health. He's worried about alot of things (OH NO! WHAT ALL DID HE TELL HER?) I don't think it's anything to be overly concerned about right now, but we should all keep our eye on him, you know this is the exact age when DJ started having problems.

Me: Yes, I know. I didn't realize he was so worried. He never talks about it. I know sometimes OCD can be inherited so it can run in families, but I also know that sometimes younger siblings can just learn behaviors from the older ones with OCD.

Mrs. Y: Let's just keep our eye on him for now.

Me: OK, call me if he comes in sick or upset and we'll come and get him.

Well, now what? I guess I'll just talk to him tonight, see what I think. I may have to take him to the doc, but for now I guess we'll just wait & see. It's hard to remember sometimes that our kids get stressed too. He knows, as do all of our kids, that their dad and I haven't been getting along very well lately, he's probably worried about that too. I feel terrible. How could he be so upset by something and not talk to me about it?

A few years ago when he was in 3rd grade I think, I went to parent-teacher conference and the teacher said "We were so sorry to hear about your dog Shadow dying" and I said "What?" She said "Colby was really upset one day when we were talking about pets and he told us that Shadow had died. He was crying about it". I said "I had no idea. That dog died two years ago and he never mentioned it once to me" What else am I missing in my son's life? I wonder if he knows he can tell me things - or since he's a middle child does he think I don't have enough time for him? Golly, it's tough being a parent. There are so many things to worry about. You know, we think they need us so much when they're babies, but I swear they need us so much more as they're making that journey into and through the teenage years.

Look out my blog friends, this is probably the first of many posts about the mental health of me & my family.

Remembering 9/11

I was at a new job at had just started about 6 weeks earlier in Children's Hospital here in St. Louis. Someone called and told us to go to the administrative suite and watch the news or to check CNN. We couldn't get on to any of the news sites, so we ran to the confernce room. I came back to my desk immediately and called my husband and he said yes, I'm watching it - Oh My God another plane just flew into the other building. We originally had thought it was an accident until we heard about the 2nd one. We were all really scared. I remember feeling like we could all be under attack in any or all of the cities througout the country. I remember going to the bathroom and hearing stange noises from the pipes and thinking that if they wanted to get a big number of people, they could certainly hit the largest medical center in the city - I was really, really scared.

I had just made the decision 6 weeks earlier to make a 90 minute commute to and from work and on this particular days, and many after it, I started 2nd guessing that decision - what if there was a crisis at home and I was an hour and a half away? It took awhile for me to work through this and I don't think about it much any more, but I do still think of those families, those children, who went off to work and school that day, like any other day - probably arguing with their spouses about who would take the kids or arguing with their parents about what to wear to school and those are the last conversations many will have ever had with their loved ones. It's so sad to think of it still - how those people are coping with life. I really feel for them and hope God is present in their lives.

Here is a link - if I can do it right of a pretty cool rememberance site.

http://www.legacy.com/stltoday/sept11/home.aspx

Moutain Dew Explosion

I was sitting at my desk at work just now, enjoying a frozen meal dinner before having to go straight from work to a dreaded Economics class and I had placed a Diet Mountain Dew in the freezer a couple of hours ago so it would be nice and cold by the time I had to leave for class.

I saw that there was some ice in it and I thought "yummy, mountain dew slushie" - I began to open the bottle and a little oozed out so I put some Kleenex under the bottle in case it spilled.

Suddenly, the Mountain Dew erupted like a volcano and it actually rained mountain dew all over me and my office. I mean it is on my door that is about 6 feet away, it's on my ceiling, all over my walls = all the papers on my desk - it is everywhere and the lid is laying on the floor about 3 feet from my desk. I'm surprised it didn't hit me in the nose & break it or something.

So here's a word to the wise - never, never open a soda that has ice in it and if you do you better be outside and wearing a raincoat. I can't do anything but laugh, if you would have seen me sitting here with Mountain Dew raining on me - you'd die laughing too - it's just one of those things you know? Now I gotta go to my first class with soda all in my hair and sticky arms - how fun.

Life stuff

My husband and I had a talk the other night. Sometimes I don't feel special to him anymore and fell that it wouldn't matter to him if I walked out and never came back. He told me he feels like no one listens to him (the kids doing stuff he asks) - I said that all of us feel like he expects nothing less than perfection and that if we don't do something completely to his standards - he feels we didn't do it at all. We know he's gonna complain about whatever we do, so we just do things our way and know that he's gonna bitch about it. We've all decided this Saturday to work as a team to try to get our house in order the way he really wants it and we'll try our best to keep it that way. Our house is not filthy - it's lived in, really, I'm being serious - other people that come to our house don't feel uncomfortable there - it's just a sickness of his and it's driving the rest of us crazy.

I reminded him how blessed we are with four beautiful, healthy children that are smart and talented. We both have decent jobs that we don't have to worry about how the electric bill will be paid (like we used to), we drive good cars, we own a nice home, our children are involved in lots of activities and so is he. We can take trips or go out to eat just about whenever we want - I don't think anyone could ask for more.

Our 17 year old continues to be a hotspot in our relationship - I feel she is a good kid and deserves to spend time away from us and with her friends - he doesn't trust her at all (she's never done anything wrong that we know about) He just "has a feeling" and doesn't want to let her go for fear that she may get mixed up with the wrong crowd - go drinking or partying - get in a wreck - he has all sorts of scenarios that really have very little chance of happening except in his own mind and says that I never think anything can happen.

Anyway, my old girlfriends and I are trying to plan a GNO (girls night out). We all feel we really need it and one friend asked me what was new. I said nothing much then proceeded to tell her about running the kids around - going to stinkin' pee wee football games I care nothing about (except if my kid gets hurt) - Figuring out all the things that come from having a daughter that's a high school senior (OMG) that wants to go far away for college but doesn't even care to get her driver's license and whose little brother is a freshman and doesn't think she should be hanging around any skanks, hoes, goths or anyone that he doesn't deem fit.

Anyway, that's sort of the jist of it. Colby's (5th grade) playing football and has a girlfriend who he "luvs to death forever and ever" Sonya (3rd grade) has a crush on a boy in her class and now refuses to wear her waist length har in a pony tail because she has "wings" right by her ears and it makes her look like a "moron"! She actually got up early this morning and straightened her hair with Heather's straightener - what am I gonna do?

So for nothing new - I sure had a lot to say. You see why I need a drink?????? Better go for now - hope all is well with my fellow bloggers:) Have a great weekend!

MIA

Everything is OK with me, I'm just really, really busy at work. I work at a university and we had new students come in this week, so I have been here early and stayed late every day so far. Lots & lots to do to get all these kids settled in.

I'll write more later, just wanted to update all of you that may have been wondering about me.

MIL fine

Well my m-i-l came through the surgery well and is recooping. She's in some pain and we've had some issues with the nursing staff, but I think she's on the road to recovery.

I stayed the night at the hospital with her last night and I'll be so glad to get off work today & go home. I've not seen my kids since Tuesday night. We've been at the hospital and working so I'm gonna spend the whole weekend with them. I really miss them today - maybe I'll go home early.

Surgery Day

Thanks to Kathi and 3carnations for teaching me how to link.

Today, my mother-in-law is having surgery on her lung. They found some cancer and are going in to remove one of her three lobes today. The whole family will congregate at the hospital and by that I mean. 7 kids and spouses, 1 brother & 1 sister, 2 special friends & anybody else we can find off the street. We sort of commandeer the waiting room anytime one of us is in the hospital. It's sweet in a small sort of way that so many would want to be there but I'm sure the hospital staff and the other visitors would probably have something else to say about it.

This is not a quiet family. They say what they want, when they want & they don't really care who is listening. I get so embarrassed sometimes, I have to walk away.

One of my husband's brothers and I do not get along. We've never really seen eye to eye but have usually been able to control our feelings (unless alcohol is involved) Recently, his wife left him and took their three children. His wife and I have a wonderful relationship and I am so glad she got out of that situation. He is such an ass! Anyway, he is mad and thinks I am wrong for 'taking her side'. I don't really care what he thinks, but all 6 of his brothers & sisters are all babies and if someone hurts one of them, automatically that person is EVIL. So, I know what I have to look forward to if I ever get divorced.

So this spring when my father-in-law was fighting kidney cancer and heart disease at the same time, this particular brother and another one showed their asses at hospital. It got so bad that my husband had to physically pick up his older brother and throw him down the hospital hallway to get him to leave the hospital. This man was completely out of control and trying to hurt people. He was throwing soda cans and fists and whatever he could find. We were all scared to death. It took 4 men to get him away from the waiting area (luckily this was in the middle of the night and no other visitors were there). It was terrible. And I so do not want to be involved in something like that again. I told my husband last night that if I got the least impression that one of them was gonna lose it, I was leaving before it even started. I'm planning to take the high road on this one & stay out of the drama.

My dad had 6 brothers & sisters also and my mom used to tell me that there was something off with all of them, including my dad. I certainly know where she was coming from, because every single one of my husband's brothers & sisters, including himself have something a little strange going on. (And sometimes, I mean that in a good way.) Most of them can cope with normal, everyday life and fake their way through the hard things, but a couple of them need serious help. You know what they say about marrying someone like your dad? Well, I think I aced that test alright, yay for me!

Please keep my m-i-l in your prayers. She needs all the help she can get.

The Count of Monte Cristo

I think it was Michelle at Tapp Talk that turned me on to this book. It was my intention this summer to read a classic novel in between each "fun" novel I read. I read 'The Sun Also Rises' by Hemingway and now I'm reading 'The Count'. When I first received this book from paperbackswap.com I was kinda iffy about it. It has over 600 pages and the print is very little. I had planned to read several classics this summer along with my 'good' novels and I wasn't sure if I wanted to waste my reading time on this novel.

It was a slow start but I told myself to get through at least the first 100 pages. I can always tell by them if I'm going to get into it or not and by the time I got there with this I couldn't put it down. It is really starting to consume me. I want to read it all the time. I bring it to work so I can read at lunch and when I go to dinner with my husband so I can read on the way. I am thoroughly enjoying this book. Thanks, Michelle for suggesting it. And to think, I was even thinking about watching the movie before I really got into this book. That would have so ruined it for me. I'm only on page 300 or so now, so I still have over half left, but I'll probably have it finished by next week - if my family will let me:0)

I still don't know how to link to other people's blogs in my posts. Kathi was going to email me how to do it, but if she did I probably deleted her as SPAM. Somebody tell me please. I want to give credit where credit is due. shaeckh@excite.com

Intent to Graduate

I filled out my Intent to Graduate form yesterday for my associates degree in business. It's only taken me 20 years for a 2 year degree, but hey, it's an accomplishment to me and one of the goals I set for myself. I wanted to have at least an associate's before my daughter went to college. She is a senior this year - so I'm just under the wire.

I have way more credits than I need, they just didn't work for the degree, that comes from years of taking computer courses & courses that matched with my schedule instead of my degree. I really enjoy going to school and will probably be a "lifetime learner" I won't stop with this degree but will work another 20 years probably to get my 4 year undergrad degree, but whatever it takes:0)

My family is going to Six Flags tomorrow. It's the last weekend my husband has free until after school starts so I wanted all of us to do something together. It should be a fun day - hopefully it won't rain.

My husband is being a real grouch lately. He has a herniated disc in his back and I know it's really painful, but he still goes on with his life. He plays softball, works out, etc - the doc told him he needed to get surgery on it in February, but he didn't want to because softball was starting and now it hurts really bad but he doesn't want to plan surgery until December - til after hunting season is over. I feel bad for him in some ways, but it's so hard to hear about how much it hurts and I feel bad that I can't do anything to fix it. He's grouchy with all of us and last night he said he wasn't even going to go to Six Flags. I'm sure it will get better after the surgery.

The Free Store

My youngest daughter has a new friend. Well, actually she talked quite a bit about this girl during the last part of the school year. They talked on the phone alot and Sonya wanted her to come over. My kids all have friends over CONSTANTLY, so it would only stand to reason that this girl would visit with us and maybe spend the night. To put things in perspective, we have four kids and have not had more than four or five nights since school got out that we have not had at least one extra kid spend the night. That's just how it is at our house.

Anywhoo, the mom didn't want her daughter to come over for some reason or another so I even sent a note to school telling her that we would love for her daughter to visit for a couple of hours or possibly spend the night. No response. Sonya didn't understand & frankly neither did I, but oh well, she got over it.

Fast forward to a month or so after school got out, we're at Wal-mart and Sonya says there is my friend - let's say Hi. Well, her mom was just outside the door smoking a cigarette, riding a scooter and she had 2 or 3 kids with her - one of which was a couple year old boy with just a diaper on and a snotty nose and the others, well, let's just say they didn't have on their Sunday best. Don't get me wrong, I run to Wal-mart all the time with my hair thown up, no make up and a t-shirt & shorts or sweats. So, maybe that was this kind of a day for them too.

So we said hello and the girl wanted to come home with us, but the mom said no. OK, we'll do it another time.

So last week the girl calls again & says her mom said it's OK if she comes over to spend the night so I go get her because they don't have a car (hence the scooter). I pull up at their apartment and the whole clan comes out to look - not say hello or tell the girl bye, just to look. So she comes over and it's 90 degrees, she's got on a long sleeved boy's shirt and I tell them to go get their swimsuits on so we can get in the pool and she says she doesn't have one - she only has swim suit bottoms and a shirt so Sonya wants to swim in her t-shirt & bottoms - OK, fine.

After she left, Sonya said 'Mom, I really feel sorry for my friend. She only had 3 outfits at school and some of them were boy clothes. I'm glad we don't shop at the "Free Store". I just smiled at her & told her I was glad too. Almost made me glad to get up & come to work today.

My son asked me 'Mom, what makes people keep having kids like that if they can't afford to take care of them? Isn't her mom embarrassed that the girl doesn't have any clothes & that they're poor like that?' I told him we don't know anything about them and that maybe they are happy with their lives. I really hope they are.

Moms

I lost my mom to lung cancer when I was 22. My daughter was 2 and I was 5 months pregnant with my son. My mother was the greatest grandmother anyone could ever have and I so wish she were here for my kids. She was so loving and would have been such a great part of their lives.

My mother-in-law is quite a bit different than my mom. For one, she is 70 and my mom would have been 53 (she died when she was 38) so they came from very different times and my mil loves my kids and she loves me. She has always treated Heather and I as part of this family and never treated Heather one iota differently than any of her other grandkids and for that I love her dearly. I think that God knew he was going to need my mom in Heaven and that my own dad is a schmuck, so he gave me Darrell's parents to keep as my own:) Anyway, she loves in her own way and loves somewhat differently than my mom. In the past, this has bugged me a little, OK, sometimes alot - we've heard it 100 times - she said she raised her kids and didn't want to raise anymore. OK, she has about 32 or 33 grandkids (I lost count) so I can see where she may get overwhelmed with kids.

Also, she insists on everything being equal for her kids and grandkids, which really means nobody really gets anything (they're on a fixed income - very lowly fixed). This is fine too except that only 3 of her 7 kids do anything for her - help her with EVERYTHING and constantly do for her and she doesn't even see half of her grandkids - I mean, she has not seen half of them in at least 10 years. So I don't understand why my kids can't get something really special from their grandma now and then (even if it's something she picks up at a yardsale) but she's afraid the others will get mad. She is getting better at this as we've been kind of talking to her gently about it. She gave me some Glade plug-ins she didn't want and tried to give me some canisters I didn't want. She also bought me some glasses at a yardsale when I mentioned that I didn't have that many, so she is getting better. EDITED - This sounds really bitchy and I didn't mean it to sound like I want all these material things, but I don't have time to reword it now. Just so you know I don't mean to be bitchy:)

Anyway, this is not why I started this conversation. (Is it technically a conversation if you're blogging it?) Anyway, we found out a couple of weeks ago that she has a spot on her lung that they're pretty sure is cancer. We'll find out more tomorrow. I love this woman, of course she irritates me sometimes, but so did my own mother (I just have to remember that sometimes when I begin to put her on a pedestal) Everyone gets irritated with their mothers & especially their mil's right? I just hope and pray that everything turns out alright with her. It would be like losing two moms to this terrible disease and I know her kids will go crazy without her. I hope this is a scare that brings us all closer together and helps us remember what family is for.

I just wanted to reflect on my two moms and how much I love them both and how much I hate that damned lung cancer.

I'm an all star momma

Three out of four of my kids have made the all-star team in their baseball leagues this summer.

I knew Colby would make it. He's 10 - playing up with the 11 year olds. DJ was a little more iffy. He's 14, and he is excellent, but he's had this thing going with this coach for the last 7 years and I thought somehow the coach would put a stop to it. Turns out this coach has the 15 year old team so my DJ gets to play with the 14 y/o all-stars. Whew!

Sonya is 8 and she's one of the only two girls on her baseball team. Everyone else is a boy and I absolutely cannot believe they picked her to be on the all-stars. Only 2 kids from her team got to go and she is one of them. I'm so proud of all of them. They get the sports thing from their dad - cuz I suck at them all. I was a cheerleader and damned proud of it. So it my 17 y/o.

Remember, we live in Missouri. Colby's team could end up making it to North Dakota, DJ could end up in California. Luckily Sonya just has one game in Potosi (our hometown) and she's done. I don't know how far the boys will go, but I sure am one proud momma no matter what happens.

I don't wanna work...

I just wanna bang on the drums all day.

Really, I DO NOT want to work. I'm having a helluva time getting back into it after only 6 days off. Why? Maybe I should look for something else, but the pay here is soooo great that I don't think we could live without it. But my commute is sooooo long and I'm sooooo tired. WOW, I think I've been around my kids too long. They taught me how to whine:)

Maybe I better just keep working....

Tagged

I don't really know how to do this tagging thing, but Kathi had a "Tell us 8 things about yourself" post and I'm going to try to come up with 8 things.

1. I absolutely love getting a pedicure (more feet stuff).

2. I have a major crush on Nick Lachey. Not like an "I want to marry him" crush, but an "I'd let him eat crackers" sort of crush.

3. I spend way too much time on the internet when I should be working. (Can I help it I'm smart enough to get 40 hours of work done in 20?)

4. I love to try new foods. I'll try anything - shark, elk meat, sushi - whatever and I love going to new restaurants.

5. I like to watch teenage shows like One Tree Hill. I say it's so I can talk to my kids about what we watch together, but I secretly like them.

6. I honestly do not care if there are dirty dishes in the sink. I would much rather sit around watching One Tree Hill with my kids. I'll worry about the house when they're all grown up. (Or I'll watch teenage shows with my grandkids:)).

7. I have been to 10 different states to watch my hubby's softball tournaments and I always buy a new bra at the outlet store when I go on a softball trip.

8. If I'm walking down the street and I see a hot guy, I'll suck in my gut & stick my chest out a little. I don't know why, I'm not interested in other men (except Nick Lachey), but it just gives me a little boost if someone else is looking at me. Kinda like - you know I still have it (a little:)).


Thanks, Kathi (I don't know how to link your blog here) That was fun.

Independence Day

Tomorrow is Independence Day and on my way to work this morning, I was trying to think of my favorite childhood memory for the 4th of July. Funny thing is, I couldn't really think of one. I have always felt like I had a pretty good childhood, though others would think not. My dad is an alcoholic. He is 54, he has 6 grandkids that he never sees, 2 daughters that can't even get him to come over to pick up his Christmas/Father's Day presents. He lives on his own terms, does what he wants and will never, ever grow up. He drank when we were kids and would come home and fight with our mom. Sometimes he would stay gone for 2-3 days and my mom would have to call in sick for him so he wouldn't lose his job. I hated my dad when we were kids and now I just feel sorry for him. I love him and I'd do anything for him, but he makes me so damned mad. How can he not consider himself lucky for what he has. He has two wonderful daughters that love him, that are self-sufficient, raising families and genuinely good people who are willing to give him money or whatever he needs. He has 6 grandkids that think he is something else. They don't get to see him often, but when they do they know it's something special. How can he not want to take part in that?

Oh well, off-topic, but before I move on I want to describe my mom, too. She met my dad when she was 13 and never had another boyfriend or lover. They married when she was 15, he 17 and she had me 5 months later while he was in Germany in the Army. They always told the story that they loved each other so much and wanted to get married but their parents wouldn't let them because they were so young so my dad came up with the perfect plan so that they could get married - they got pregnant!!! Anyway, my mom was the absolute best mother ever. She worked 2 or 3 jobs to make sure my sister and I had what we needed. I don't ever remember going without but I know we were poor. I remember times that our electric or phone was shut off and we moved every single year of my elementary school days (I can only assume it was because we didn't pay the rent,(maybe)) Anyway, she was so loving and so good-hearted, she would do anything for anyone. My mom passed away when she was 38 years old from lung cancer. My first daughter was 2 years old and she was the apple of my mom's eye. Oh, how I wish she was still here to see all of her grandkids. They would love her - oh so much.

OK, back to 4th of July. I can just remember going to this big lake in Flat River, MO and BBQing, my dad drinking Busch and my mom drinking 1 1/2 little bitty beers & having to take the bucket to bed with her:0) Letting off snakes & sparklers & being afraid of firecrackers & bottle rockets because they might "blow your fingers off" or "put your eyes out". I don't remember any specific year on Independence Day or I don't remember any talk of what the holiday meant to our country. I'd like to try to do something with my kids this year that will help them to remember our troops and what they're going through to keep our country free. We'll definitely talk about it tomorrow and maybe we'll go online and adopt a soldier or two to bring home the idea that the soldiers are real and they're fighting for our freedom. I don't agree with this war. I feel like sometimes we stick our noses in where they don't belong, but I 100% support our troops and pray that God keeps them safe.

Happy Independence Day!

Bob Seger Memories

I heard this on the radio this morning and it just reminded me of long ago summers. hmmmm, sweet. I love Bob Seger. He was the first concert I ever went to. I was 13 (it was my birthday present) and I went with my parents, aunt & uncle & my best friend Karen.

Above, on the left (the redhead) is my 14 y/o son DJ and my nephew Aaron is on the right.

Above is my 10 y/o son, Colby standing on 3rd base - this one looks alot like his dad and I've seen his dad stand on 3rd base in that exact pose - hundreds of times. Isn't that weird?

These are my two beautiful daughters - Heather is 17 and Sonya is 8. We're a big baseball family. This is Sonya's first year plaing (other than T-Ball). See her pink helmet? She has matching shoes - I love baseball for girls:)

Was I drugged?

I went out for cocktails with one of my best friends from middle school and her sis-in-law. We went to Casa Galardo(sp?) for margaritas. I told my husband we were probably just having a couple of drinks and I'd be home. I live about 1 1/2 hours from where we were going to be, but my husband was going to be in the same town doing something with his dad and I thought I could always call him to come and get me if I needed to or my sister lives in the same town and I knew she'd give me a ride home. I wasn't worried about drinking and driving, but I really wasn't planning on drinking all that much.

Anyway, I arrived at Casa at 5:30pm and we each had 3 margaritas. We ate appetizers and stayed there until about 8:30pm. We were having a good time talking. I did not feel drunk at all. I felt relaxed. (I drink occassionally - I have had entire bottles of wine (or two) by myself and not been drunk. Recently, I drank and entire bottle of margaritas (already mixed) and was quite drunk - but I knew what was going on (and I was at home). Anyway, we decided to go a couple of blocks to a nightclub that had a band we really like 'The 80's Band". We arrived there about 8:45pm. On the way, I called my sister to see if she wanted to meet us at the bar and she agreed.

When we got there, Sally, my friend's sis-in-law order a round of drinks. I had 1 Schmirnoff & Red Bull and a shot of Goldschlager. We were dancing and dancing, having a great time. It was so much fun. There was an old man (probably 60'ish) with gray hair and big square glasses dancing around all the girls. He was sort of a creepy little guy, but I didn't see any harm in him dancing with us. He didn't touch any of us (well, not me at least). About 30 minutes after we got there, a waitress came around with Jaegermeister shots (wow, I can't believe I can't spell any of this stuff today) so Sally and I each had one of those. My friend Karen is a little bitty thing so she can't handle as much as Sally and I can. We've got some extra meat on our bones. Anyway, I bought the shots and split the two of them into 3 cups - giving Karen very little. We danced some more, having a really good time.

My sister arrived about 10:00pm and when she came in, I ordered another round of drinks, a Schmirnoff & Red Bull and another shot of Goldschlager. I did the shot but did not drink the drink. I carried it over to the table and we all went out to dance again. My sister, Shelly is not a dancer, she has to be drunk, drunk, drunk to dance so she waited at the table. So this is her story from now on.

She began thinking while sitting there that it was a breeding ground for anyone wanting to drug somebody because everyone was just leaving their drinks on the tables as they danced. I was dancing and just smile, smile, smiling - really cheesing it she said. She says she could tell I was a little tipsy when she came in, but did not suspect I was drunk. After a few minutes of watching me dance she said she saw a complete change in me. Suddenly, she said, it looked like I had taken a Xanax or something, my eyes were glazed over and I came over to the table and said 'I have to go to the bathroom, NOW!" She went with me (I remember the bathroom) - On the way out I said "I have got to go outside, NOW! I'm going out! Gotta get out of here, NOW!" so she went with me - she said I stopped to hug an old man with gray hair and glasses on the way out (I have no recollection of this). We went outside and I sat in the car - she went back in to tell the other girls what was going on and I began to violently throw up outside my car. I was 'out of it' when she returned. She called my husband to tell him she was taking me to her house and he should pick me up there (I do not recall giving her my cellphone or the number to call my husband). There were two guys parked next to me when she returned and commented that it was a good thing I had someone there to help me.

She made me climb over the seat (so I didn't have to pass by those guys) and get in the passenger seat ( I do not remember this at all) I don't remember her driving me home but I woke up in the passenger seat and had to throw up again. Her two kids were sitting on her stoop and I remember looking at them and smiling (really big) and waving. Then I threw up. My nephew told her later, "Man, Aunt Shannon was so happy, she couldn't stop smiling."

My husband came and she said I just looked at him and smiled real big and said 'Hello' - I don't need you anymore, I'm OK now. (I do not remember seeing my husband at all) He took me home, no more vomiting - I slept on the couch cuz he was perturbed at me and I had one hell of a headache the next day (I even had to hold an icepack on my head for awhile).

I thought I was just shitfaced, but then I started thinking - from 5:30 pm to 10:00 pm (4 1/2 hours) I had 3 margaritas, 1 Schmirnoff & Red Bull, 2 shots of Goldschlager and 1 partial shot of Jagermeister. I know that's a lot, but like I said, I can usually hold my liquor pretty well and I do weigh close to 200 pounds, so I'm no weakling. I never even thought anything else until Shelly said, 'Man, it was like night and day, one minute you were fine and dancing and the next you were violently ill!' It's like someone put something in your drink or something. Then we started thinking about that old man & I'm kinda creeped out and so, so glad my sis was there. It's hard telling where I would be if she hadn't have been there. I would have probably gone outside by myself and not know what in the hell was going on. That old guy could have gotten me or maybe the two guys parked next to me.

Even if I wasn't drugged (I doubt there's anyway to find out now) I will be so much more careful now. I am not wired to think that way, but my sister is. I will have to start being wired that way. This thing really scared me. I probably wouldn't have even thought of the old guy except that he was outside the bathroom (my sis said he looked like he was waiting for someone) then I hugged him, wtf? Why would I do that?

I very seldom go out without my husband, but now when I do, I'll be extra careful.

Summertime, Summertime Sum, Sum, Summertime

Well, the graduation party went smoothly, except my older nephew got a little too "happy" on vodka & made a few of us uncomfortable. I love this one so much - I've always had a special place in my heart for him. He "came out" a couple of years ago and since this is mostly a redneck family - it's difficult for him to deal with his uncles, grandpa, etc. Everyone has sort of accepted it now, but the "underneath" stuff is still there and I just feel like when he's around us, he's so uncomfortable in his own skin, that he drinks to give himself courage. I just hope he doesn't get this way at home (and I told him so the next morning when he called to apologize). I told him he really had me worried and I was afraid he was developing a problem with his drinking. He told me he knew he needed to slow down some and that he would work on it.

All in all it was a good party. My wonderful father-in-law had a few of his older friends out and they "jammed" in the garage. He plays the fiddle and they play guitar & sing. I was so glad to see him feeling like doing something like that. He was diagnosed with kidney cancer in March and had a heart attack a couple of weeks later. Once he recovered from the heart attack, he had his kidney removed at the end of April and has been a little depressed since then. I'm so grateful he felt like coming to the party and playing music - I think that's one think that truly makes him happy.

Things are basically the same around our house. Still baseball in full swing - at least for the next couple of weeks, but after that hopefully, we can plan to do some fun summer stuff to do. My husband is really grouchy, but he's coaching both of Colby's teams and I think it is just too much for him. He's used to having time to do his own thing - he usually plays softball 4 nights a week, but hasn't hardly played at all yet this summer. He's playing in a tournament this weekend, so maybe that'll cheer him up. He's also not sleeping at night. He's taking Ambien, but I think the effect is starting to wear off. My snoring is keeping him up - and I know it's cuz I need to lose about 50 pounds - OK, at least 30 pounds - but I just can't seem to get up the energy to do it. I'm so freakin' tired all the time. Probably because I need to lose about 50 pounds! Big circle!

Work is starting to suck some~ I work at a university and our new students are getting ready for the fall. They are all so excited about coming here, they have hundreds of questions and want to know what they're schedules will be and when Christmas break will start yada, yada, yada - driving me a little bonkers, but I can't help but be excited for them too. They're starting a brand new life here and they're scared too. Parents call too. They're scared. I think it helps parents to talk to someone who is also a parent and they think I might care a little more about their kid:) I care about them all - unless they're buttholes:)

Oh well, that's enough for now. Oh yeah, I'm reading "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway - I'm telling myself I can read a smut novel - then I have to read a classic , then another smut novel, etc. I'm really enjoying this book - but I'm almost finished. I've got Anita Shreve 'A Wedding in December' planned next and I need to figure out my next classic - any suggestions?

More later,
Shannon

graduation party

We're hosting a graduation party for my nephew at our house this weekend. I think we got chosen because we have a pool and because someone didn't want to clean the house:)

Mine is never clean either, believe me - it's pretty disgusting down deep, but we can make it look pretty good on the surface when we want to. I took the day off tomorrow (working at home - one of the only perks I got when I became a manager - stupid decision) So I'll be working my butt off all day tomorrow and Saturday morning just for people to come and mess it all up that afternoon. You know, we should clean our houses really good after a party, not before.

This particular nephew has something going on with him, but I don't know if he's ever really been diagnosed, or if he just has a combination of things. They thought he was autistic when he was 3 or 4 because he was so smart already. Honestly, he could read (taught himself by memorizing) when he was 3. He was an avid horse racing fan - because Gramps and Dad were - and he liked to read the racetrack books. He was tested and they said no on the autism, but think he may have a touch of Asberger's. He is the sweetest thing and I love being around him. He's really smart at math, but lacks some social skills. You have to engage him or he won't talk to you. He wants to be a math teacher. I'd like to try to help get him into the local community college because I hate to see him sit at home now that high school is over and waste away. His parents don't really know what to do at this point, but they've always done the best they could by him, so I'm sure he'll be fine.

Anyway, I'm so proud of him for graduating and I have high hopes that he will rise up and be everything he wants to be. I love you, Cody Allan. You're the best~!

More later,
Shannon

Don't ya just hate it

I couldn't find anything this morning. One shoe has completely disappeared. I looked in every closet in my house and under the bed, so I'm stuck with shoes that sorta hurt my feet after awhile. I couldn't find my slip. I just had it on yesterday, but i can't find the clothes I took off last night. I know someone did not actually pick them up for me - but I looked in the dirty laundry, just in case. Nope --- not there - so I'm wearing a dress without a slip and you can definitely see through it when the sun hits it (Guess I won't be going out at lunch for a walk) and shoes that hurt my feet. Ever have a morning like this? It stinks.

More later,
Shannon

Don't really have much today

My mind isn't thinking clearly, I'm so tired from all this baseball. Two games last night. I hope it rains tonight so Colby's will get rained out. I know he'll be so disappointed but I'm so danged tired.

Not much going on at home, cuz we're never there. Darrell had a talk with Heather yesterday about getting a summer job and getting her driver's license (she's 17). She wants to go to college in Texas next year, but she can't even take the responsiblity to get her license. She helps alot around the house and will do things when I ask, but she doesn't really do initiative well. She has this friend that I really don't like and she spends most of her days trying to figure out how to get to Hope's. Any suggestions on what to do if you don't like your kid's best friend?

Sonya is going to summer school with my sister's kids in St. Louis so I'm bringing her back and forth on my way to work. I have to get up way earlier to do it, but I'm hoping to make it a good habit I can keep up when summer school is over.

That's about all I got for today.

More later,
Shannon

You might be a busy momma if....

Every morning when you stop to get your Egg McMuffin - you have to pull up to the trash can at the end of the drive-thru to throw away remnants of last night's fast food dinner.

Baseball is about to kick my butt - 3 kids playing on 4 teams
2 kids had games Tuesday (Colby & Sonya)
2 kids had games Wednesday (Colby & DJ)
1 kid had game Thursday (Colby)
1 kid had game Friday (DJ)
2 kids have 3 games on Saturday (Sonya & Colby)

And we have 4 newborn kittens in our home. Cinderella gave birth in the middle of the night last night and she was sure the proud momma this mornin'. She was just'a purrin' and so happy with herself. She's gonna be a great mom and they all look like her - I have no idea who the daddy is (I hope that's the only time I ever say that about a part of my family:))

In a Funk

I'm in a funk today. I woke up mad that I had to get up. Sometimes I just start the day wrong. I went to bed in a bad mood and I guess it just carried over & now I can't seem to shake it.

Darrell was griping at Colby last night because he had a bad game, not really, he struck out once, walked once, popped up once & got a basehit, but Darrell thought he wasn't trying hard enough. The conversation ended with Colby crying, me getting p*ssed that he was making such a big deal about a baseball game (come on, what kid goes into the batter's box and DOESN'T try?) Not mine - they live for baseball and they do their best. Why make it hard for them to like the sport?

I have a really hard time getting up on time - I can be at work anytime before 9, but I have to work 8 hours, so if I don't get there til 9, I can't leave til 5:30 and with a 1 1/2 hour commute, I don't get home until at least 7. I'm changing my hours for the summer to 7:30 - 4 so I can get home earlier in the evening & spend time with the kids. If I can leave hours before they wake up, it won't seem like I'm gone so much. Anyway, I didn't get up til after 7 this morning so I was late - Life just sucks today.

Then I had an argument with Darrell again. It's summer now so we have extra kids at our house all the time and we had two extras last night. I didn't go to the grocery store because I had to go to two baseball games, so there's nothing to eat. I asked him to get them something this morning. He just calls & says he's going to pick up McDonalds for two of them because the others already ate waffles - HUH UH! No way, you're going to bring McDonald's for everyone - it's not fair to bring it just for a couple - He was like, I was going to bring it for all of them - Fine, then just do it.

More later,
Shannon

Weekend to Remember

I had a really good holiday weekend. I took off work on Friday and just piddled around the house, went to lunch with Darrell & DJ & Robert. We went to Mama T's, not to be confused with Mama Toad's, the local buffet pizza place. Wen to get my nails done - I'm so glad I did - I love it when my nails are done - they're so pretty. Make me really feel good about myself.

Saturday went to Tiff for a BBQ & horseshoes, washers, swimming in the river, etc. Had a really good time. Heather joined us (she hasn't been there with us for years) and we had a great time visiting with friends, having a few beers, eating, playing washers. It was fun.

Heather & I went shopping on Sunday & the boys went to the Cardinal game. Sonya stayed at my sister's the whole weekend.

Monday, we joined some people from our church for a picnic. It was a gorgeous day and the kids fished in the pond, there was a softball game and volleyball along with lots of good stuff to eat! The little kids even had a frog race - it was a wonderful, exhilarating weekend. Now we're off to a busy, busy week with lots & lots of baseball.

More later,
Shannon

You might be a busy momma if....

you go to work without your shoes on...

It was the first pretty day we'd had in a while and I really wanted to wear sandals, but my toenails were not painted yet for spring (or any other season). Don't say I could have gone with naked toes, because you haven't seen my toes. I have a funky toe. It's got a fungus and it is really disgusting - so I absolutely cannot force anyone other than those in my immediate family to see my toe unless it is polished.

Anyway, I decided to throw some polish on them real quick and let it dry in the car on the way to work. I got about 65 miles from home when I stopped for gas. I looked in the backseat for my shoes, but they weren't there. I searched the car - to no avail. I must have left them sitting on the couch as I walked out the door.

I had to get gas barefoot (luckily I use my debit card at the outside pump, so I didn't have to go inside.) I then drove to Walgreens and walked in barefoot (no one even noticed) and straight back to the flip flops (in my day, we called them thongs, but not anymore:). I purchased a very stylish pair of black flip flops to wear with my dress capris and business shirt - it was a rather interesting outfit, but hey, at least I got to work.

More later, Shannon

Back Again - Take Two

You see, I have this habit of starting something and never continuing or finishing. I'd really like to keep this blog up to date. I read a couple of other blogs daily and get really upset when they don't post for a few days. Good thing I don't have any avid readers yet. Maybe someday.

We're in full swing with baseball. Games Monday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Practice Tuesday, Friday & Sunday. What d'ya bet someone calls practice on Wednesday? I really do love watching the kids play, but it's a little overwhelming right now. I'm sooooo tired, I can't keep my eyes open.

Home life is OK right now, though I'm a little pissed at DH for not making a bigger deal out of my birthday Sunday. I know I'm an adult, but I sure wish he would have put a little effort into it. The kids could have been better, too. My daughter is 17 and had money, she could have tried to do something special. Hubby was playing softball and taking the boys to the WWE that night. I ended up having to take his mother and sister to pick up a truckload of JUNK. They did take me to eat afterwards, but didn't offer to pay until my daughter reminded them it was my birthday. Nice, huh? Anyway, I feel like I go out of my way to make people feel special on their special days and no one thought I'd like to get the same on my special day. This was the shittiest birthday I've ever had. I sure wish my mom was alive - she'd have made it special.

More later,
Shannon

Family Health

We lost a dear old friend this week. Margie was 75 had 10 kids and there were hardly any visitors at the funeral home last night. A couple of her kids were there, but one lives in New York and did not want to come home for her funeral. How does that happen? That you raise a child, and Margie was a good mom, and she doesn't even want to come home for your funeral? I think there is not respect left in this world for the elderly. It's so sad.

My father-in-law is at the hospital (the wrong hospital - it's the same one that killed my mom 15 years ago) today because he was just diagnosed with kidney cancer. He's having a biopsy today to find out if it is indeed cancer and if it has spread anywhere else. They'll probably have to do surgery next week and remove the kidney. I hope and pray he's alright. He's a wonderful, caring man and deserves nothing but the best.

DH is going to Kansas City this weekend for softball tournament. He just played a tournament last weekend and was gone the whole weekend.

We have two b-days next week. DJ is about to turn 14 on the 18th and Sonya will turn 8 on the 19th. We'll have a party weekend, that's for sure.

More later,
Shannon