Thursday, January 31, 2008

Why are brothers & sisters so mean to each other?

Colby hates the sound of a metal spoon on a glass or ceramic bowl. He has to eat everything out of a plastic bowl - I just noticed this a few months ago, I don't know when it became an issue for him. He can't stand even a fork or knife on a glass or ceramic plate. He hears these sounds when the rest of us are oblivious.

Here is the conversation last night as Sonya was eating cut up chicken noodle soup out of a coffee cup at the kitchen table. He was pouring himself a soda (that in itself is a miracle because he never does anything form himself.)

Sonya - just eating, minding her own business.

Colby - "Sonya, stop making that sound with your spoon!"

Sonya - completely ignoring him

Colby - screaming now "Sonya - knock it off. Quit making that sound!"

Sonya - begins to scrape her spoon louder but still completely ignoring him.

Colby - at the top of his lungs "Sonya - if you don't stop making that sound I'm gonna come over there and make you stop!"

Me - "Sonya - please stop doing that with your spoon. You are aggravating your brother. Try to be a little quieter with your soup."

Sonya - "I'm sorry Mommy. I'm just eating my soup - I didn't know I was bothering him." This is all said with her back to me so I couldn't see her face, but I'm certain she had a very devilish grin on her face.

A few minutes later...

Sonya starts taking her spoon and going around and around the cup making all kinds of shrieking noices.

Colby runs over there and grabs the cup and spoon and puts it in the sink. Of course, she screams and he gets in trouble. Poor kid - his sister was just pushing his buttons. She was in trouble too - but she really deserved it. Oh well, I don't imagine it was too rough on them to go to their rooms. He was happily playing video games and she was playing with her new gerbils about 15 minutes later, neither one remembering they'd just had the house in chaos.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Kids Basketball

We were really busy with basketball this weekend.

It was Homecoming so Heather's cheerleading was supposed to be very special. She has looked forward to it since school started this year - this being her senior year and all. It didn't go at all as planned and she ended up quitting the squad. She's been a cheerleader all 4 years of high school. I told her that her and I were going to talk to the coach to see if we could work something out. The coach is new this year and has some definite ideas about how things should go. Heather, being a 4 year veteran has some definite ideas about how things should go so I'll let you know how that goes.

Saturday, Sonya had 2 games and Colby had 2 games and Darrell was out of town playing softball. I went to Sonya's first game and sent Colby with a teammate's parents. They brought him to me after his first game and watched Sonya's 2nd game while waiting for the boys to play their 2nd game. Confusing, huh? Anyhow, some of the parents were getting a little emotional at Sonya's game (3rd & 4th grade girls) and my friends commented that Colby's game was worse. The parents almost came to blows over the calls of the referees. Colby even had a mark on his arm of a shoe print where a player from the other team had stepped on him - I'm thinking not on purpose but the other parents said it probably was on purpose. He's fine - but still has a purplish mark on his arm.

After Sonya's games, we went to Colby 2nd game. As soon as the game started, the other team was demolishing us. They were beating us like 32 to 8. The coach on the other team was screaming at his players and I was really getting annoyed at how he was treating these 11 year old boys. My son happened to be part of an all-star baseball team with this guy's son a couple of years ago and I thought he was an arrogant jerk then, but he didn't have anything to do with the coaching so I didn't quite see this side of him.

I commented to one of the other moms that if that kind of attitude from the coach was how you won a basketball game, I would just as soon lose! She agreed - we both thought he was going way overboard.

About that time, the referee didn't see a foul on one of his boys so he started yelling at the ref that he needed to watch the game - the ref ingnored him but the guy kept on. At one point, the ref even said "Sir, you are winning this game by 20 points, just keep quiet" The guy got even more mad and kept running his mouth. Finally, the ref gave him a technical foul which means a player, of our choice gets to shoot two free throws without anyone else on the court. The guy still wouldn't shut up - he said "I get a technical just for asking you a question?" The ref said "Sir, I've explained to you that I'm just doing my job, please sit down and be quiet or I will throw you out of the game" The ref was not rude in any way and he remained calm. The guy kept up "You'll throw me out of the game just for asking you a question?" The ref calmly looked at the officials and gave him another technical foul and told him he was out of the game and had to leave the premises.

Meanwhile, all the boys on both teams didn't know what to do. They were astounded. The guy left the gym but wouldn't leave the building and at half time, he wanted all of his players to come out of the gym so he could coach them. The ref stood his ground and said that wasn't allowed and would not let the coach have any contact with his players. I was so glad he stuck to his guns. This guy should have been made to leave altogether, but the ref was doing the right thing.

It didn't really matter, we still lost the game 51-22, but it sure was interesting. After the game, alot of the parents went up to our coach and told him how glad we were that he was coaching our sons and how much we appreciated him. I had a talk with my kids on the way home and told them never to act like that at a game and that the other coach was completely in the wrong and should have obeyed the referee from the get-go.

We live in a very small town and it's amazing how seriously some of these parents take these game - I mean it is 5th grade basketball or 3rd grade in Sonya's case. I'm shocked that grown adults would act like this in front of their own kids and everyone else's kids, too. I wonder if he was even embarrassed after thinking about it later and I really doubt he was.

You could not pay me enough money to be a referee, umpire or any kind of official for children's sports. It is utterly ridiculous what these people have to put up with. Thinking of it now, I'm going to talk to my husband about calling the governing body and complaining about this guy. He was out of control!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

No phone for Heather today

We had to take our 17 year old's phone away from her yesterday and I'm completely bummed by it. She is really a pretty good kid, but I cannot get her to take any responsibility. She's set to go to college in a few months about 3 hours from home at the University of Missouri at Columbia (Mizzou). She still does not drive, she will be 18 in May. I've tried to get her to drive - I've offered her my mustang, she doesn't want to learn to drive a stick. We had an older model Taurus - it wasn't cool enough. We bought her an older model I don't know what but it's red & it's a convertible (my husband is in the body shop business, so we've always got cars around) Anyway, we bought it in September & told her when she got a job, Darrell would work on it and get it ready for her (it had a lot of little things wrong with it, but she was happy with it).

That was 4 months ago and she still doesn't have a job. We've told her she cannot drive until she gets a job so she can pay insurance. I don't know what the heck is wrong with her. I just want her to work a few hours a week to show responsibility. She has lots of responsibility around the house - but I wanted her to learn to deal with money - not the $20 a week a give her in allowance.

On December 22nd we had a heated argument about something and I gave her an ultimatum - get a job by January 22nd or I take your phone. Yesterday was January 22nd and still no job! I had to take it. I hated doing it. I didn't want to do it. I feel really bad for it - but I had no choice. She is really pissed. She didn't think I would do it.

Now, I've issued another ultimatum - have a job within 2 weeks or she's grounded until she gets a job. She hasn't even really tried to get a job, she's filled out a couple of apps, but hasn't followed up, etc.

After that, I don't know what I'll do. She can't go to Columbia if she doesn't drive - how will she get around, how will she get home? If she doesn't get a job and a license - I'm afraid I may have to force her to stay at home for college. Suggestions?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Thoughts & Prayers Please

I'd like all of you to keep the family of Brendan Wiles in your prayers today. He is the 13 year old skateboarder that died in a skateboarding/vehicle accident in St. Louis last weekend. His funeral is today. My nephew was really good friends with the boy and he and my 8 y/o niece are really taking it hard. It's tough for the little ones to lose one of their own, I guess because they feel they are indestructible.

This is a very sad time for this group of friends and family so please keep your thoughts and prayers with them in the coming days.

Attached here is an email from the principal of the school they all attended - in case you missed this story this past weekend.

Date: Jan 13, 2008 10:33 AM
Subject: Tragic News in our Community and Hancock District.
Body: Hello everyone,

On Friday evening one of our 7th grade students, Brendan Wiles, was struck by a car at Lemay Ferry and Green Park . It was fatal, but was revived by paramedics. He was taken to Cardinal Glennon Children’s Hospital where family and friends were together praying and pulling for him to survive through a miracle; however, we were told in the afternoon that there was only a very slim chance of survival if any. His friends visited the Chapel in the hospital each time another friend showed up to support Brendan. A picture of Brendan is attached above; this picture is on

At around 2-3PM we were told to say our goodbyes to Brendan 2 at a time as we were told there was little if any hope that he would survive. It was unbelievable how many of his friends and family were present praying for this miracle. During this time we made plans to invite all of the students up to the Dome from 6-8PM so that they could spend time together as they awaited news from Brendan’s final test for brain activity which was supposed to be between this time period. The time elapsed, but still we had no results as were notified that his blood pressure was not stable enough to run the test. We then talked to all of his friends at the gym about the updated news from his family that he was still in an unstable condition and could not have the test run. We talked to his friends about this tragedy, what they can do to help, what they can do to get through this as best as they can, and also what we would be doing at school on Monday whether we received miraculous or tragic news. We asked everyone to go home at this time because it was getting late, but gave them a way on to be updated when the test results were given. At around 12-12:30AM, we received the tragic news that Brendan J. Wiles began his journey to Heaven.

Brendan J. Wiles was an outstanding student and person. His friends took up an entire bleacher section. His friends were so well behaved and showed great patience during this horrible time. No kid at this age should have to go through such a horrible event like this, but his friends are showing great unity and strength together. With the family’s permission along with the Park’s permission, we will move to plant a tree near the new skate park in Jefferson Barracks Sylvan Springs with a memorial plaque shaped like a skate board to remember this kind, loved, and missed young boy.

Many rumors have and will continue to surface throughout this time which tends to happen when so many are involved. It is important that everyone knows the truth which is stated above and not all of the false rumors and news from other sources. There are also conflicting reports to what really happened on Friday night in regards to the car striking Brendan, so please do not speculate or solely go by what the news stations report as we all know they can be premature with their findings and in many times be a one-sided version. It is important that Brendan rests in peace. This is not easy for his friends or family so please be understanding and give them some time if they need to visit with counselors or administrators upon their return this week. No plans have been set as of yet for his funeral visitation and burial, but an email will go out as soon as we know the arrangements.

On Monday, Sherry Rischbieter and Amanda VanHorn have counselors available for any students and staff who need support. Officers, Steve Rowland and Mike Maxwell, will be keeping an eye out for all media. Please talk to no media and direct them to the superintendent’s direction. Do not let any media or outsiders talk to any of our students under any circumstances; notify the office of any phone calls or visitors on our school grounds.

Thank you to CC’s Pizza, Crusoes, Papa John’s, Pizza Hut, Imo’s, and White Castle along with the help from Mary Joe Ruder, Erin D ittrich and Mary Hoffman for the donations of food for our kids at the Dome last night! Thank you to those of you who were able to visit and give your support to Brendan’s friends and family at the hospital and/or Dome. Thank you to Connie Asher, Judy Moore and some parents who are making T-Shirts today with a picture of Brendan on them for his friends and family; thank you to Wal-Mart for their assistance! Kim and Jimmy Freed, who own The Wedge, and the owner of Dry Dock are collecting money for his parents to help with financial costs. The support from his friends’ parents yesterday was truly amazing as well in how loving they are for all of the kids while they cried and asked so many difficult questions; they stood strong for their kids and their friends at the hospital and the gym!

Brendan has an older brother, Allen, in the high school who will need your support and prayers. He is a great young man with a severely broken heart. Please pray for Brendan’s family and friends that they pull together and deal with this as well as possible. Prayer:

Dear Lord, please give Brendan J. Wiles’ family, friends, and especially his parents (Chris and Shellie) and his brother (Allen) the strength to pull together in this most difficult time. Brendan was truly an outstanding young boy and student who is loved by a countless number of friends and family. We pray that you guide his family and friends in their decision making and the healing process through this tragic time. We know that Brendan is in your kingdom and this is difficult for our young people to understand sometimes, so please assist them in having a strong faith in believing that Brendan is in a better place now and his pains and suffering are gone. Thank you Lord, Amen!

Thank you,

Tom D

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