The Heat and the Revelation

Last night, I rented "The Heat" with Melissa McCarthy.  I was really excited to watch it and thought the hubs would enjoy it, too.  Comedies used to be his favorite kind of movie.  I had heard the language was raunchy (which made me want to see it even more - I love me some f-bombs!) and that it was hilarious.  Colby told me it was one of the funniest movies he'd ever seen so I was stoked to watch it (do people say stoked anymore?)

We didn't eat dinner til after 8 and Darrell was hee-hawing around when finally I told him I was going to put the movie in the DVD player in our room.  There were a few times that I laughed out loud at some things that Melissa McCarthy said (I really, really like her as an actress) but to be honest, I fell asleep a little more than halfway through it.  I realized that I don't like watching stuff with Darrell anymore.  Every time I think he is going to really enjoy something on TV, and I "save" something for him to watch - just waiting for his reaction because I know he's going to love it - he doesn't!  There is no reaction - there's no laugh out loud moment for him - just crickets.  So, I'm don't trying to find stuff he will like in a movie.  I gave up watching American Horror Story for this and I'm disappointed that we didn't share a laugh like I thought we would.  I hope this is not happening to me.

Don't worry, I'll watch AHS tonight and probably the rest of The Heat before I return it.  And I'll watch by myself - maybe I'll get a few more laughs out of it.

Today is Day 4 of Advocare.  I didn't have to drink the fiber drink this morning but instead took two probiotic capsules that are supposed to aid in the digestion process.  I've only been to the bathroom once so far this week (totally normal for me but I expected more from a cleanse.)  I've been told perhaps these probiotic pills will get that process going as well.

I did pretty well with the clean eating yesterday and so far today.  I'm not totally following it to the T so I don't know if I'll have the expected results.  I'm also not moving my ass at all (as in exercise) so I'm sure that will keep my progress from being as much as I had hoped for.  I don't know why I always think these types of things are suddenly going to change the person I am.  I was so gung-ho to start this cleanse and planned what I was going to eat, bought different stuff at the grocery store and have filled my cabinets with healthy food but now that I'm actually doing it, I'm not following it to the letter of the law so I'm left wondering why do I even try these schemes?  I know this is different that Hydroxycut or any other pill I've tried.  It's different that the cabbage soup diet or the HCG (really?  I really put HCG hormone under my tongue thinking it was going to help me lose weight?) or any of the other fad things I've done and I do feel like if I switched to this type of lifestyle or diet at least 80% of the time, I would definitely be more healthy and probably alot slimmer.  I think I can work toward that goal - to eat this way at least 80% of the time allowing myself the tablespoon of sugar in my morning coffee (altogether - not just one cup) or couple of small pieces of cornbread with my ham & beans without beating myself up.

I think the key always has been and always will be exercise.  I really don't eat that much and I do make good choices most of the time (except when it's birthday bonanza day) but I am going to have to make the commitment to exercise if I want to see real results.  I just don't know if I'm ready for that yet.  I think I'm ready but I also thought I was ready to eat clean for 10 days without cheating at all.

I'll leave you with this lovely picture of Paula Deen riding butter.  I hope it works (not sure how to post a gif).  You may have seen this before but today was my first time ever - and I laughed out loud:)

Best Laid Plans - Advocare - Day 2 & Day 3

Despite my having packed enough food yesterday for 3 days on Advocare (I felt like a bag lady) yesterday was a bust!  There was a birthday extravaganza at work all day with a bonanza of food for the entire day!!!  Ain’t nobody got willpower for dat!  Well – I don’t anyway.  I did OK until the afternoon munchies hit me!  I swear the table looked like this....

Then my daughter’s sports banquet was last night – again the cooks in the PHS school district ain’t got time for no clean cookin’!  That’s for sure!

Ugh!!!  I thought I’d get away with green salad and I had a boiled egg and some almonds but I did have some turkey & gravy – no mashed potatoes – and green beans with a salad - but then I spotted the strawberry shortcake and I may or may not have had a taste (try the whole damned piece – somebody shoot me now!!!)  I couldn't stop myself - it was like a drug!  Why is this so danged hard!!!

Buttttt………………

I’m back on the wagon again today – so far, so good.  I feel good.  The past is behind me, yada, yada, yada!!!!!

So, I’m on Day 3 now – still no bathroom visits for me.  I’ve read on other blogs that sometimes it doesn’t happen until you start the probiotics which is tomorrow.  Plus, I wondered if my cheating had anything to do with it.  I've never been particularly regular in that department anyway - well, until I had my gallbladder removed a few years ago - since then, I've been just fine. 

I don't feel constipated or anything - really, I don't feel anything.  How can this be cleansing anything if there is nothing coming out!  I hate to complain about that because it might just bite me in the butt soon but so far, nuthin'!!

So, I leave you with these words of wisdom.......and hope I can take my own advice - or the advice of someone else's image on the internet!!

My First Cleanse - Day One

Okay, everybody (yeah, right - no one reads this blog - oh, well - I'll just pretend:)) I'm doing my first ever cleanse and it is the Advocare Herbal Cleanse.  I've been leading up to this for the last week.  I started "eating clean" last Monday morning and I'm proud to say that I did a pretty damned good job of it.  I did fall off just a couple of times and I really mean, a couple - like two, maybe three times throughout the entire week.  I didn't drink one soda - not even a drink of a soda the entire week! 

I didn't eat any junk food - well, the first three nights, I did eat one large tablespoon of Rocky Road ice cream before going to bed but in days past, I would have eaten a bowl.  On Friday night, I had drinks with my very best friend and I had four Bud Lights but I looked up before I went and beer is the 2nd most clean drink you can drink - although you should abstain - who the hell cares - life still happens and we can either sit back and watch or participate!  I participated! I had peel n eat shrimp while I was there so that was clean but when I got home, I was starving and I had a huge bowl of Cocoa Pebbles - totally not clean!  But I was right back on Saturday morning. 

I really stretched myself this weekend and I made up this chicken/veggie cous cous (look at me - cooking - and cous cous to top it off!!)  It was pretty good.  Then I made a

deer meat stew - I'm not that in to venison but with all the hunters in my house, I always have a ton of it around and when I started searching for clean recipes, this one popped up!  I must say - it was dyno-mite!!  Here is the recipe for Sweet Potato Venison Stew.  Yumm-O!!! 

So, I started the actual cleanse today - I did the fiber drink this morning and drank the
Spark.  The fiber drink was just OK, dog (Randy Jackson - AI).  I put it is apple juice and it was entirely too sweet for me today.  Tomorrow I will get some Tropicana 50/50 and try it in that.  The Spark was pretty good - kind of tastes like a fruit punch drink.  I can live with it and I didn't have any coffee today - I ALWAYS have coffee so we will just see how this goes.  I don't think I've yawned yet today so that's a plus. 

WARNING * POTENTIAL * TMI *

Since I have a 90 minute commute in the morning, I was more than a little worried I'd have to make a pit stop part of the way through, if the "cleanse" hit me and my friend even told me I should have started yesterday to see how it was going to affect me.  Well, I did have to stop at QT on the way here today.  I couldn't hold it -

but it was only to pee:)  I'm not used to drinking 8oz of Spark, 8oz of apple juice infused herbal cleanse and 8oz of water (recommended after the fiber drink) and water just goes right through me!!  I absolutely could not wait a moment longer and had to stop at QT and run in to pee!

Also - I packed an actual duffel bag of food for today - left over cous cous for lunch and deer meat stew for dinner plus makings for a salad and a banana and an apple and some almonds.  Eating clean is not easy - you absolutely have to plan because it is not convenience and if you find yourself starving with nothing clean to eat, you will most definitely run to the vending machine or the nearest fast-food restaurant.  I have class on Monday nights until 10:00pm so I knew I had to be well-prepared for the late afternoon and late night munchies - I think I got it covered.

So that's my day so far and it's only 10:00 am.  I'll let you know how I feel later - with no coffee:)

Letter to my daughter, the freshman

Dear Sonya,

Tomorrow you begin high school.  You are my baby girl and the last of my children to pass this milestone so I want to take this time to give you some advice for high school.  Hopefully, some of this will stick and hopefully, you'll even carry this on past high school.

High school doesn't last forever.  There will be days when you think it will never end but someday you'll look back and wonder where the time went.  Enjoy every second of it.  Yes, every second.  Even the pop quizzes and embarrassing moments you're bound to have.  It helps to shape your grown up self and you'll cherish the memories later.  Have fun and don't take it too seriously, it's only high school.

Some people will try to tell you that these are the best years of your life.  I sure as hell hope they're not.  I want your high school years to be fun but I want so much more for you.  I want you to go to (and finish) college.  I want you to travel and see other parts of the world.  I want you to have an exciting career doing something you love.  Later, I want you to experience marriage and children but I want you to have a whole lot of fun before then.  I want you to live for you before you take on the role of wife and mother.

You will fail at some things during high school and it won't mean the end of the world.  You might not make everything you try out for but don't stop trying.  Half of the fun is in the trying.  Try something new - something the rest of your group isn't in to - make it your own.  Break away from your group now and then and experience some of your high school years with new people.

Some people might be mean to you.  Don't take it personally.  Cut them some slack.  You have no idea what they are going through at home.  Brush it off if they make fun of you or give you a dirty look.  Remember, you don't have to attend every argument you're invited to.

Don't be a mean girl!  If you are having a bad day and you're an asshole to someone - apologize the next day.  Trust me, this practice will come in handy later in life.  It's OK to be in a bad mood sometimes - just don't let it carry on the next day.  On the flipside, if someone is an asshole to you and apologizes, let them off the hook - as long as this is not a cycle that continues every day or week.  If so, there is no reason for that person to be in your life. 

Don't be afraid to admit it if you're wrong.  You may know with absolute certainty that Harry Stiles' favorite food is pizza and you get in a terrible fight with your best friend because you just know you're right.  Then you find out that his favorite food is actually tacos - admit your wrong.  It only hurts for a minute, I promise.  Don't be a know it all!

Don't talk badly about anyone, especially your friends.  Find the good in people.  It's there, if you just look.  Be careful with your secrets.  Your best friend today may be your worst enemy next year and she just may try to use your secrets against you.  Instead share your secrets with your mom:)  I promise I'll try not to judge - if I do - remind me that I promised you I wouldn't judge.

Don't get mad at someone (brother, sister, family friend) if they tell me if you're doing something that might seriously hurt you - like drinking and driving, drugs, etc.  It will be for your own good.  If someone tries to tell me something about you that won't seriously hurt you - I will tell them to mind their own business.  I don't need to know everything you do but if your life is at risk, no friendship or sibling relationship is worth the cost.

Give compliments freely.  Every one could use a compliment now and then.  If you see someone with a cool bracelet or a cute shirt, tell them.  If someone does something nice for you, say thank you!  It goes a long way.  Some adults could learn from that, even some adults in your family.  More people should say thank you!

For the love of God, date more than one person in high school!  Please do not think you will get married to your high school sweetheart!  Give me a break!  Give yourself a break!  Give that poor boy a break!!!  Don't only go for the cute jock - give the average nerd a chance.  How will you ever know your type if you only ever date one type of guy?  Friendship is the foundation of love so be careful when you friendzone someone:)

Be friends with all kinds of people, regardless of their looks, social status, or GPA.  Each person brings something different to the table and you can learn so much from other people.  Be friendly, talk to everyone, and don't forget to stop talking and listen now and then.

Confidence is 99% of any journey.  Be confident.  Be strong.  Be assertive, not aggressive.  Be respectful.  Be brave.  Be kind to people, all people.  Be honest but not to the point of being hurtful.  You can always find a way to be honest with someone without having to hurt their feelings.  If you have to sugarcoat something to save someone's feelings, do it.  A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down (Mary Poppins)

Those people who seem like they have it all together - they just don't.  Believe me, there is something they're missing or something they're worried about.  Even the "in" crowd doesn't think they fit in sometimes.  Unless they're Regina George - then they're just a bitch and need to get over themselves - but even Regina was missing something in her life - don't you remember her mom?  She had concrete boobs for goodness sake!

Love your dad.  This is important.  I know you're not exactly a Daddy's Girl and I know your dad is not always the easiest person to get along with.  I know he acts like he knows it all and he's rough and loud and embarrassing sometimes but that man loves you - probably more than anything on this earth.  Your dad's knees buckled and he had tears in his eyes the moment you were born.  He will protect you, above all else, until his dying day.  All he really wants is to know that he has been a good dad (and sometimes that means being a mean dad.)  He needs to know you love him and he needs to feel appreciated from time to time.  He does a lot for us, you know.  A hug and and I-Love-You from his baby girl every now and then will go a long way, trust me.  It will melt his heart and make him go a little easier on you.  Don't wait for him to show his affection because he was never really taught to do that.  I've been trying to teach him for years and it's just now sinking in a little but don't wait on him to make the first move.  Just randomly show him that you appreciate him - go up and give him a hug for no reason - send him a text that says I love you, Dad (and not just when he lets you go somewhere or gives you an extra $20.)  Your dad isn't always the kindest man on the planet but that man will always support you, always defend you against anyone or anything and always, always love you with all his heart.  There is no one I'd rather have on my side and I truly mean that.

This has gone on long enough and now I have tears in my eyes.  You probably need to get ready for your first day of high school, little girl.  I love you so much, Sonya.  You won't have a genuine understanding of how much I love you until you have children of your own.  I know you are not perfect.  I know you'll make some mistakes and some of them will be boneheaded mistakes, just please be careful.  You only have one life - don't take life too seriously but give it the respect it deserves.  Always carry my love in your heart and your dad's voice in the back of your mind telling you to do the right thing! 

Remember, high school doesn't last forever.  You'll get through the bad days and you'll cherish the good days.  Take it for all it's worth!  Learn all you can from these years - have a ton or fun - make new friends - don't participate in the drama - don't accept fake friends - be true to yourself - you are worth it!

Love, Mom

First ultrasound today - heart rate 172 - 9 weeks!

I had a great weekend!  I took a vacation day on Friday so I could attend parent teacher conferences and Colby's first baseball game and it was a gorgeous day!  So glad I took the day off.  I heard some pretty positive things about both of my kids, the Trojans won by a score of 10-nothin' and we got to spend time with Heather, Wesley & Nolan.  We went to Pepper's after the game because Boo's had a line out the door.  They had a buffet but after looking at it I decided to stick to my good eating habits and order the chicken breast.  It was actually pretty good.  I was afraid it would be dry but it was really juicy and seasoned well.  I had a salad, chicken, green beans (I'm sure they were full of bacon grease but oh so good!) and a few bites of big curd cottage cheese (not a fan!)  Darrell had rolls with his open faced beef and my mouth was watering so when he didn't finish his second one, I asked for a bite and immediately spit it out - totally not worth the calories!

Saturday morning Sonya had a volleyball tournament in Arnold.  She spent all night with the team so I didn't have to be there at the ass crack of dawn but still made it by 10:30.  My nephew and his wife were there with their baby who is almost as big at 9 months as Nolan is at 1 year!  Geez!  He is a beast:)  Had a really good talk with them.  Wesley brought Nolan to me and he spent a few hours watching volleyball - except for the few minutes it took him to pee on me (damned cloth diapers) and to do a faceplant into the trophy case.  The tournament didn't go so well but we were finished by 1:00 so Sonya and I decided to run by Target (I had a $20 gift card.)  I wanted a new shirt to wear to the bowling alley but couldn't find anything.  Nolan wasn't a big help as he refused to stay in the cart!  Sonya and I got a few new unmentionables and we were on our way.

Stopped by Cato's while Sonya napped in the car and returned a few purchases from last week.  I found two new blouses (I knew I'd only keep one of them) and ran home to change before the Colorama at the bowling alley.  I have been looking forward to this all week, had been wanting a drink since Wednesday and knew I would most likely be staggering out of the bowling alley by the end of the night.  Here was my outfit for Saturday night.  Don't look at Sonya's room - it's a mess!

This is also my 180 pound picture!  I've officially lost 25 pounds and am starting to be more confident in the way I look and I think you can tell by the smile on my face!  (Unfortunately, my unhealthy habits of Saturday night found their way back to my hips because I was up 2 pounds today but I'm confident they'll be gone again by the end of the week!)

So I had quite a few beers that night and I originally wanted to go out dancing after bowling but by the time we left, I was in no shape to go anywhere but home!  I woke up at 8am to let the dog out, went back to bed, got up at 11am to eat a big ass bucket of Cookie Crisp, went back to bed where I rested my eyes and watching TV until Darrell forced me out of bed at 1pm!!!  Nothing really hurt but I was just soooo lazy.  I tried to make breakfast, burned the biscuits not once, but TWICE and then had to get ready for league bowling. 

Started off with a good game (for me) of 111, but then I don't know what in the hell happened and I ended up with a 74 or 76 for the 2nd game and a 107 for the 3rd game.  All in all, I got my average (93) for the night.  Home and made an early night of it.  Got some bad news from DJ but I'm still working that out in my head so will have to decide whether to share his issues later on:)

Shit ton of work and a new dress

Just left a meeting and figured out I have a shit ton of work to do and I don't even know where to begin so I've decided to update my blog instead.  In the past couple of years my job has shifted to more task oriented to project based.  I have several huge projects that I'm responsible for in the run of each year and I need something to keep me on track since I've always just done tasks associated with projects but I've not been responsible for the whole project like I am now.  Getting ready to start using Microsoft Project and wondering if anyone (this would be great if I had actual followers:)) used this and how it worked for them.

I wore a new dress to work today.  I bought it from Land's End on clearance a few months ago and it's kind of a jersey dress.  The top is kind of a faux wrap so I look like June Cleavage today - just need my pearl necklace....or not!!  It's a royalish blue and I am getting complimented every time I see someone - Yay! for me!  I don't know if it's the extra boobage I've got going on or that I'm walking with my head held a little higher these days.  Confidence really does attract attention.  Whatever it is, I'll take it.  

 Don't you just love when someone tells you "you look great today!"  - thanks, but I guess that means I looked like shit yesterday???  No, really.  I'll take whatever compliments I can get:)  They help keep me motivated!When I first started working here about twelve years ago, my wardrobe consisted mainly of dresses and skirts.  For the past five or so years, I've noticed I hardly ever wear anything but slacks now and that sucks.  I love dresses and skirts so I'm making it a point to re-introduce them to my stale wardrobe so hopefully that will help to keep the motivation going, too!

Weight Loss and Weekends

So over the past few years I've been letting myself go and not just my weight!! I've been sloppy about my clothes and my hair. Now part of this is because of my financial situation so it's not all because I'm a fat-ass but regardless, somehow I've become a middle aged (hmmm, I struggled with this word and didn't think it could be used to describe myself but I am almost 43 so if I live to be 86, that's middle aged!). Anywho, suddenly I'm a middle-aged frumpy woman!! I don't want to be that!!

Usually when I'm trying to lose weight, I'm looking for instant gratification. I hate, hate, hate that it takes so freaking long to lose weight!  In the past, I would have celebrated a 5 pound weight loss with a Blizzard from DQ.  That was before I saw this pin...

This time around I've decided to kind of start doing some things that make me feel good in the process to help keep me motivated!  I got a new haircut (which I really don't like but it's growing on me:), with a little color.  I bought a few new makeup products to help me look better - I absolutely love new mascara!  If I ever win the lottery, I will buy a new tube of mascara every week!  So, little things like a new bra (or in my case, big things like a new bra) can make you feel like a million bucks without adding to your hips!  

So, I can finally say I'm down 20 pounds.  I use the Lose It app and went to see when I started this latest diet and it only gives me calculations for 4 weeks, which sucks - but whatcha gonna do??  Anyway, I started tracking my food again on January 30, 2013 and I think a couple days before that is when I weighed in at a whopping 205!!!!!  My scale this morning said this...

That's 20 motha f'ing pounds, Sweet Pea!!!  Whoopee!!!  Now, to continue.....this isn't the first time I've lost 20 but it's the first time in a long time.  Here were my 205 pics.  I really don't want to do this.  I wish I would have taken some better ones - with more clothes but I didn't so here it is.  I promise you folks, it's not pretty but I had to start somewhere and I'm hoping to never ever see this again...

OK, that's done, now let's move along...

So, I've been so proud of myself and really using the app on my phone to help me make better choices.  I've been eating alot of eggs, almonds, bananas, Smart Ones (which I'd like to get away from) and if I MUST eat out, I've been using my app to help me decide what to eat.  It's amazing how many calories some things have in them.  Meals that I would have previously thought weren't too bad, when I check them out I'm like - no wonder I'm a fat ass!!!

Hubs has taken to bowling lately and we were at the bowling alley Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday - UGH!!  Not my ideal weekend but we did have a really good time and spent some quality time together.  I did get a lot of compliments from him on my appearance Friday and Saturday night and he's been extra attentive lately.  I honestly can't imagine my life without that man - he really has been my rock - the rock I'd like to bash against the side of a brick building some days but I absolutely know he will be by my side through whatever life throws my way.  I can't wait to see what the next phase of our lives is like, now that two of our kids are out on their own and we have two teenagers left in the house.  I'm hoping he mellows a little but when things with the kids get a little rough, I'm glad I can depend on him to be the strict one - if it was just me, I know they'd run wild!!!

Here's one more pic of me before heading out Saturday night.  I wanted to get one of the both of us together but after the beer started flowing I forgot all about taking pictures. 

What Brought Me Back

As I said in my previous post, I stopped blogging (not that I was ever that good at it) when I figured out Facebook.  Then, I got turned on to Pinterest.  It was there that I found Mama Laughlin.  Like so many others, she has inspired me to do more about how I feel about myself.  Did you notice I said 'do more about how I feel about myself' and not 'do more about my weight problem?' - ok, just making sure.

I've struggled with my weight for years and if you ever go all the way back to the first time I started blogging in 2006 you'll probably see some evidence of that - oh, what I wouldn't do right now to be at the weight I was in 2006 - you know when I felt like I was morbidly obese.  I really don't have any idea what my weight was then (7 damned years ago!) but I can guaran-damn-tee you it wasn't 195 pounds!!!  And I'm sure I thought I was sickening and that's the highest my weight would ever be - boy was I wrong!

Lately, I've noticed a few things - and this was before Mama Laughlin - I don't really want to walk in front of people at an event - I used to love being the center of attention - to dress-up in heels - the whole get up.  You'd NEVER see me in a t-shirt and sweats.  Hell, I didn't even own t-shirts back then.  I hated sneakers - they made my feet hurt (I swear they did!)  Now, I get dressed for work in an office but I hardly ever wear heels - now they hurt my feet and I feel it's because my poor feet have to hold up my fat ass.  They're tired folks - they can only hold so much and I've been pushing them to their limit - so they push back.  When I started working here almost 12 years ago - I wore dresses ALL THE TIME - now I only wear dresses on very special occasions at work and NEVER at home!  I want to wear dresses and heels again!!!!

So, my youngest son is in high school and he plays basketball.  Of course, we go to most every game and I've noticed over the last couple of months that I have anxiety walking into the gym and up the bleachers.  I just know what people are thinking of me.  These people have known me for a long time.  My two older kids went to this school and I've been around these families for-eve-r!  I know they're thinking how much I've let myself go - maybe they're thinking I used to be cute - but good gawd what the hell happened!  I'm probably making myself out to be way worse than people truly see me but hey, that's what happens when you lose your self-confidence!  I've been taking the long way around the gym so I don't have to walk directly in front of too many people and sneaking in the side entrance and right up to where my hubby is usually waiting for me.

I am usually starving by the time I get to these games.  I have a 90 minute commute and that's a long damned time since lunch!  I almost always want popcorn but this year, I've been making my hubby go to the concession stand and get it for me.  I don't want people to see me walking in with it and think 'boy, she really needs that popcorn!'  Also, once I'm all the way up the bleachers, I'm kind of afraid I'll fall (I don't know if this feeling is a fat feeling or an old age feeling:)) but I never used to worry about it and used to walk up and down the bleachers in heels while talking to people behind me and probably doing somersaults!  Now it scares me - or does it???  Maybe, I've made myself think it scares me so I don't feel as guilty asking my hubby to go get my popcorn for me at half-time.  I'm not sure - I'm going to be on the lookout for more behaviors like this now that I've brought it to my own attention!

Also, I'm not as outgoing as I used to be and I'm usually happy now to be sitting in the background - pulling my shirt to make sure my rolls aren't too obvious when I used to be up going from table to table and talking to anyone that would listen.  I've lost myself - and I want me back!  I'm not nearly as confident as I used to be and I am way less willing to take on anything new (like look for a new job when this one gets me down!)  I'm in a rut and I want out!  Mama Laughlin helped me see this and I'm reading through her blog a little at a time because I am inspired to get most of my old self back along with a new bit of sass that I know is in there somewhere!

I'm bbaaaaaaaccccckkkkk! - What it's only been a year?

OMG! It's been a year since I posted on this blog! Idk what is wrong with me. I used to love to do this but when Facebook took hold, it took over my life for awhile. I don't even care if anyone reads this blog, I need a place to keep my thoughts straight. I didn't make any New Year's Resolutions this year but now that it's the end of the first month of the year I'm thinking maybe I should set some goals for myself.

I saw this on Pinterest the other night and it really got me thinking of declaring my goals first so I could realize my dreams (gotta figure out what those are) and secondly, I've been thinking it is a good idea to have sort of a bucket list for 2013. If I actually publish a list of things I'd like to accomplish in 2013 perhaps I will actually do at least one of them. Then I can say "Look what I did in 2013!" How exciting will that be? I know - probably not that exciting for anyone that might read this blog but pretty damned exciting for me! So here goes - these are the things I'd like to accomplish this year (and I reserve the right to revise this list at any time...
1) Get healthy - I weigh 195 pounds (man that was hard to type) right now and my goal is to weigh 140 which is what the surgeon general says is a healthy weight:)

2) Begin a masters degree program (I think I want a Master in Public Health but I will reserve that judgment until I've researched a little further.)

3) Go camping in our camper that has been sitting at our house for a year now not being used.

4) Go on an extended trip with my husband that does not involved him playing softball (and by extended, I mean longer than leaving Friday night and coming home Sunday afternoon.)

5) Do at least 5 DIY projects from my Pinterest board I'm not going to put anything about being a better wife, mother, etc because I am already awesome at those things (what can I say, you caught me on a good day - I'm sure you'll hear more about my shortcomings later:))

So this is it for now, it's all I can think of off the top of my head but I fully plan to edit as I see fit, hopefully, by just adding things and not taking anything off.

OK, according to the quote, I wrote the dreams down with a date so that makes them goals now. The next thing I need to do is add the steps necessary to make the goals happen and my dreams come true - UGH~! If only it were that easy. I'm gonna give it a shot though so wish me luck.