Hmmm! Attach, what can you say about that? We are all attached in one way or another, right? Whether it be to our spouses, our children, our pets, our jobs, our homes, our hometowns. I'm wondering now if there is an instance that someone out there is not attached to anything?
Just got a picture in my mind of a person without a home (homeless)- putting the person first is an OT habit I've picked up - it's not a homeless person, but a person without a home - that way being homeless doesn't define the person - get it? Like a person with a disability. Commonly, we will describe that person as a disabled person - but then the disability defines the person, not the other way around. People should take care to let the person define themselves - anyway, that was a short road trip - I'm back now...
So attachment - lately, I've been struggling with my growing family, thinking of them grown up, how they'll get along, will my children be close? Next to Darrell, and sometimes ahead of Darrell, my sister is my closest companion. We talk about everything, we help each other make decisions, we gripe and vent and cry to one another and I can only hope that my children someday have relationships with one another like this.
The way things are right now, at these ages, 21, 18, 14 and 12 - not so much. Heather usually gets along with all of them, but there are times when I'm sure she'd just as soon smack the crap out of one of her brothers or her sister as to look at them. But she doesn't and for that I am so glad!
Sonya usually gets along with her siblings, but sometimes it's because she just ignores them. When she does get riled up - look out! She's going for blood!
DJ and Colby are a source of concern lately - they seem to fight about every stinkin' thing they can! They're jealous of one another, theyre competitive with one another, have a really hard time giving the other one a compliment on something done well. They make fun of one another, make jokes at each others' expense and generally just walk around the house with attitude for one another looking to engage the other one in an argument.
What makes brothers do this? Is it normal? Will they outgrow it? I have a hard time right now thinking they will ever have a good relationship with one another and it's tearing me up. I've spoken to both of them about it, told them how worried I was about it and that they should try to be on the same side for awhile, to no avail. And to be honest, I think one brother is as bad as the other. Neither is innocent of giving the other grief. When one is quiet, the other starts in and vice versa.
So, will I ever have the family that looks forward to spending time together? When they grow up and have families of their own, will there be tension at family get togethers? I sure hope not because we're all attached and will continue to be whether they like it or not - I hope they end up liking it and that this is just a stage - like when they wanted to wear their Power Rangers outfits all day, every day. They grew out of that - hopefully, this too shall pass.
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