RIP - Jackson Rod Stewart

Our family dog was hit by a car yesterday. It was really my son's dog. He slept with him every night and DJ is devastated! I feel so sorry for him I don't know what to do. We were hit with a "wintery mix" yesterday and he is a white poodle. We live on a gravel road and the people down the road come and go at least 100 times a day. I swear they never stay put. They don't have jobs or anything, so I guess they don't have anything better do it. It really wasn't their fault, Jackson was running beside their truck and they had to go faster to make it up the hill in the snow and ice (at least they had a reason to be charging up the road this time) and they didn't see him. DJ heard him yelp and ran over to him and he was still breathing but only for a few seconds. He died in DJ's arms and he was out of his mind with grief. He was crying and screaming and jumping up and down, throwing himself on the ground in the ice & snow. It took me about 30 minutes to get him in the house and he cried all night long. I just don't know what to do to make him feel better. He even had two friends spend all night and he basically ignored them all night. Thank goodness they had each other to keep them occupied.

He really feels like it's his fault. It's his OCD talking telling him he hasn't been good enough, he hasn't been going to church, etc. That's why God took his dog. How can I compete with OCD?

This dog went in and out whenever he wanted. We live in the country so our dogs run free. If he sees DJ outside, he runs to the door and bumps into it until you get up to let him out. DJ was outside shoveling off the driveway so he and his friends could play basketball and he moved my car. He wasn't doing a very good job because I could see out the window that he was getting my car stuck in the snow and ice in the front yard so I opened up the door to tell him to just leave the car where it was and Jackson ran outside. He feels like if he wouldn't have moved my car, I wouldn't have got up and let the dog out. He is so wrought with guilt - he's sleeping now, but I'm hoping he feels better today when he wakes up.

Also, when we got Jackson from the pound, he was already named Jackson. We started calling him Jackson Rod Stewart because on Hannah Montana - Hannah's brother's name is Jackson Rod Stewart so we started calling the dog that when he was in trouble or we were just playing around with him. He was such a good dog. The only one we've ever had that was already housetrained and would let us know when he needed to go out. He was very smart. Jackson will be missed by the whole family and I pray that God will bring comfort to DJ and take away his unnecessary guilt.

"This close" to having a boyfriend

I picked Sonya up from baseball practice with the boys last night. Darrell wanted her to come and practice with the boys for awhile, grounding balls, etc. I wasn't thrilled, but she didn't seem to mind, so I didn't put up too much of a stink about it. I called about half way through and she was ready to go so I went to get her.

When she got in the car she said "I was "this close" to having a boyfriend until the teacher had to start running her mouth" What! How rude, I said. Don't say things like that about your teacher. "Well, Mom - this boy was looking at me and said he wanted to ask me something, then he was about to ask me and the teacher said "blah, blah, blah". So, he never asked" Who is this boy, I asked? "He's really big and alot taller than me, probably Colby's size (Colby's 11, she's 8). He's not fat, he's muscular" What? She's 8! I asked her what about JP (the crush she's had all year). She said "I'm tired of waiting around for him, I've moved on" Oh!

Whatever am I gonna do with her? She is an amazing 8 year old (will be nine in about a month). She wants to go on a trip to Chicago for her birthday on a plane! OK, we don't know anyone in Chicago and have never been there, but that's where she wants to have her birthday dinner - I was thinking more along the lines of Cici's Pizza.

Also, she wants a laptop. She's been searching the net for one we can afford. How on earth can I get her a laptop when I have 3 children older than her that do not have laptops, however, I am truly considering buying one for the entire family to use. Is that spoiling? I don't want to spoil my kids, but we really do kinda need more than one computer. The one we have now is in the living room and we're all fighting for time on it. There are 6 of us and we all use it to some degree. I'm planning to buy Heather a laptop before college but I just don't know.

I'm also a little embarassed to say that I checked Southwest fares from STL to Chicago and I could swing it if I really want to, maybe have just a girls trip with Sonya, Heather and I. What would be the reason not to, if we can do it financially? Do you think it's too much too soon and I'd just be setting myself up for horror later on? I need a guidebook - you'd think by the fourth child, you'd have all this figured out, but we're in a much better position now than we were when Heather was 8. Should we make younger kids stick to the same rules as the older ones did at their age? Heather's already mad at me because I got DJ a cellphone when he was 13 and she had to wait until she was almost 15. Times were different then, get over it!

V-Day

Happy Valentine's Day!!!!!



Your candy heart tells us that you don't need Valentine's Day at all – you're romantic 365 days a year. Valentine's Day is just an extra excuse to show people how much you care about them. You probably make the most of Valentine's Day even when you're single. Instead of moping, you wear red, hand out cute cards and candy, and flirt with everyone you meet. You love love, and we love you for it!

I heard you got accepted to the zoo?

My baby is going to college!!!!! Yay, Heather! She got her acceptance letter from Mizzou (University of Missouri at Columbia) for those of you not from around here:) When she called to tell her dad (my-ex) her little sister there got on the phone and said "Dad said you were accepted to the zoo? When are you leaving?" How funny! She has two little sisters at her dad's and I sometimes feel bad that they don't have the relationship with her that Sonya does. They'll never know how great of a sister she is and how loving and compassionate she is to Sonya. Well, maybe later in life when they get away from that jackass and their mom!

Anyway, this post is about how proud I am for her and how excited I am for her! While I'll miss her terribly, I hope she is able to take advantage of all of these new opportunities to the fullest extent and not think about boyfriends, getting married, having babies and all the other dumb stuff I did instead of going to college when I should have.

One other note about her dumbass dad - when she told him, his reply was "I'm happy for you, but I don't think you'll make it. You won't be able to leave your mom long enough to go away to college" What a complete jackoff! One more reason why I hate his guts and I almost wish I could say that the reason I was ever with him came from a drug-induced period in my life. Well, it didn't so I don't know what I was thinking. I struggle to think sometimes that I actually chose to be with someone so stupid! What in the f*ck was I thinking? I'm so glad I have her but I wish I could have gotten her without his input! What a jerk!

So, again I got off subject thinking about what a prick he is -

I'm so very proud of my daughter and I'm bittersweet to think of her all grown-up!

Way better than a Superbowl party

My husband has been sick alllllllll weekend and I was about to go nuts! He is normally on the go from sun up to sundown stopping for only short breathers. He was out of town last weekend playing softball so I was rather looking forward to us doing something together this weekend.

I went to my first Superbowl party a few years ago and really had fun and I was looking a little forward to one this year. When I asked him earlier this week if we were going to go out for the SB he was like "nah" OK, no biggie, we'll probably do something Saturday night. Well we didn't, we had 3 basketball games on Saturday and an appointment with our tax guy and when we got home he went straight to bed. I was so shocked because he was on the couch Thursday night, Friday all day and night and now back to bed on Saturday. I actually tried calling the doc, but he's sick too and I tried to convince him to go to Urgent Care and get a shot in the butt! He is really prone to pneumonia and it sounds like it's starting to go into his chest.

Anyhow, by yesterday, I was so ready to get out and actually get away from my kids. Now, I know some of you moms are probably gasping that I would want to do that, but I've been home with them since Thursday and I'm ready to rip their heads off (he, he, he, of course not)

By early afternoon, I had decided we weren't going to go anywhere because he was still laying around - and I'm not feeling so sorry for him now because he's really beginning to get on my nerves. I'm sorry that he's sick but for the love of God man, get off the couch or GO TO BED!!!! The rest of us shouldn't have to walk around tiptoeing because you don't feel good! Go in the back of the house where it's quiet!

OK, so Dave calls & asks if we're going to the SB party and I say no - Darrell's really sick and we're just gonna watch at home. Then Darrell says he wants to try to go for awhile - maybe some hot wings will open his sinuses (I know, I know)

So we do - and he tried to be a trooper - I was actually excited about getting out of the house and I was having a pretty good time at the party but then he said he felt bad about half way through the first quarter so we just went home.

We finished watching the game and commericials at home and I actually started to doze off during the 3rd quarter - I don't ever watch football until the SB. Well the fourth quarter got heated and Colby came to snuggle with me and watching him talk about football and what strategies should be used and how he didn't want the Patriots to win because they were cheaters and didn't deserve it was soooo cool. He knew so much about football, I was amazed and he was biting his fingernails and really wanting the Giants to win and when Manning through that pass and Burress he went crazy. He was sooo happy and to think I may have missed that pure joy by being someplace else during the Superbowl. I should have known I'd be so much better off at home.

Also, here's my favorite ad from last night. I'm a sucker for the baby ads.




and here is a runner-up for me - I thought it was very, very funny.